


Love Doesn't Discriminate (Between the Sinners and the Saints)

by umisabaku



Series: Designation: Miracle [4]
Category: Haikyuu!!, Kuroko no Basuke | Kuroko's Basketball
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-13
Updated: 2016-04-19
Packaged: 2018-06-01 23:39:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 19,684
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6541456
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/umisabaku/pseuds/umisabaku
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"Akashi has two problems: he can’t just seduce Furihata, he has to seduce all of Furihata’s social network and he’s not entirely sure how to do either."</p>
<p>Or, the story of how Team Akashi squares off against Team Furihata and Akashi tries to Win at Love.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is the direct sequel to my story, "You Could Never Wear My Crown (Cause it Weighs Too Much)" because it needed a more lighthearted conclusion. It references the events of that story heavily, so knowledge of that one (and probably the rest of Designation:Miracle) would help.
> 
> Also, I figured mathematically enough time has passed since "Don't Blink" that they're probably in their Second Year now, so I aged them up accordingly.
> 
> Hinata and Kageyama only make a tiny guest appearance, but I figured I made this whole crossover universe, I might as well have it crossover and tag them in accordingly.
> 
> The title came from the awesome Hamilton musical, in the song, "Wait For It."
> 
> Thanks for reading! Comments and kudos make me incredibly happy =)
> 
> Edit: The wonderful and talented @z-hard has drawn [this absolutely amazing picture for chapter two.](https://umisabaku.tumblr.com/post/160177413044/z-hard-self-indulgent-illustration-for-love) Go check it out because it is amazing!!

Furihata is in love with Akashi Seijuurou. Probably.

That _probably_ trips him up a lot; he’s very disturbed by that _probably_ because he’s the kind of person who falls in love fairly quickly and regularly and he’s never doubted that he was actually in love before.

But a lot of things were different from _before._

Before, he had never fallen in love with a guy.

And before, he’d certainly never fallen in love with someone like Akashi Seijuurou.

And he’d certainly never had someone _reciprocate_ his feelings, before.

So this is all kind of new, and really, he’s not sure how to handle the situation. He’s not even sure which “before” matters.

Before he got abducted and shot. Before Akashi Seijuurou became important to him. Before Furihata’s brother messed with his head and made him confused and doubtful about everything.

Yeah. Things seemed easier before Kyo got involved. Furihata’s fairly comfortable with blaming everything on his brother.

*

After he’d been abducted, and shot, and nearly died, and operated on by American doctors in Honolulu, Furihata didn’t have any real doubts about what he was feeling.

The worst part about being shot, and almost dying, and subsequently being hospitalized for awhile, was he had a lot of time to _think._ And he’d always had a tendency to overthink things, so when he had nothing to do but lie in bed and think about what had happened to him, he thought so much it left him exhausted.

And while there were many things about his whole ordeal (that’s what his mom called it, an _ordeal,_ and Furihata figured it was as good a word as any to describe abduction by mad scientists) the one thing he kept going back to was Akashi Seijuurou.

They’d had to, for reasons that were still a little unclear to him, pretend they were lovers. So Furihata thought about Akashi’s lips—the way he kissed and licked and sucked on Furihata’s skin. He thought about the way Akashi held him, tight and possessive but also desperate and needy. He thought about the body against his body and the space they’d shared; so close to one another that the air Furihata breathed was Akashi’s sighs and moans and whispers of his name, _Kouki,_ and it was all the most intimate thing Furihata had ever experienced.

It was so hard to remind himself that it had all been _pretend._

(He hated that; he hated it so much, the word just felt so wrong. Because it implied that what they’d shared wasn’t _real_ and that wasn’t right. It was real. It was the realest thing Furihata had ever experienced, even if it was just a ruse.)

He thinks about the way Akashi saved him, but also the way Akashi clung to him; Akashi’s demands that Furihata talk to him, touch him, keep him grounded. Akashi had needed him in those moments and Furihata had needed to be needed. Because if he hadn’t been wanted, if he hadn’t had a task to follow, he would have lost his mind immediately and there would have been no recovery, even after rescue came.

So in those long hospital hours, when visitors weren’t allowed and Furihata was left alone with his thoughts, he realized he was in love with Akashi Seijuurou. It was more than just that, Akashi had become _important_ to him. This wasn’t like all those other times Furihata had fallen in love. Furihata didn’t want anything in return; he just wanted to be near Akashi, to live in the same space, to be allowed in his presence.

Because he was sure this feeling wasn’t requited. His feelings were never requited. And people like Akashi Seijuurou, handsome, rich, athletic, all-powerful, did not fall in love with people like Furihata Kouki.

Akashi probably never wanted to see Furihata again, now that their _ordeal_ was done.

*

Furihata thought until he was sick and he really needed someone to talk to because he was still a little perplexed by this new aspect of his sexuality and also a little dismayed that he probably wouldn’t ever see Akashi again, unless Seirin had a game against Rakuzan.

So he talked to his brother.

He waited until their parents went to get dinner and then unloaded a nonlinear, fast-placed babble in Kyo’s general direction that boiled down to, “I’m totally gay for Akashi Seijuurou now please help.”

Kyo, to his credit, listened to everything with extreme patience. And when Furihata was done he only nodded and said, “Well, that makes sense.”

“It _does?_ ” Furihata exclaimed.

“Yeah. You just went through a traumatic experience, and Akashi was there with you. It’s only natural feelings would develop under the circumstances. It happens all the time. There’s a phrase for it. Hmm… Suspension Bridge Effect!” Kyo said, snapping his fingers, pleased with himself. “You know, the idea that if you’re on a suspension bridge, and you see some girl, and your heart starts to pound because you’re terrified of heights, but you think it’s pounding because of the girl, right? So you think you’re in love because you associate the heart-pounding with the girl you saw. Or, boy. In this case.”

“Oh,” Furihata said, slumping in his hospital bed, feeling crushed. “You mean… it’s not real?” He didn’t even mention the fact that he’d actually made out with Akashi, not quite knowing how to explain the whole, “they were pretending to be lovers” thing.

“I’m not saying that, exactly,” Kyo said, but there was a tremendous amount of pity in his voice. “It’s just—you _did_ have a really traumatic experience. There were probably a lot of emotions dialed up real high—it was a really intense situation. So it only makes sense that you’d naturally cling to the person who went through that with you.”

Furihata’s eyes started to well up and he blinked rapidly.

“Hey, Kouki, it’s _OK._ You know, if you’re gay now, I’m totally supporting you, 100%. Just take some time to process things, OK? See how you feel in a few months, when things are back to normal.

And Furihata nodded because it made sense. It made him feel like his heart had just been torn out of his chest and ripped to shreds, but it _did_ make sense.

*

When Akashi showed up at his hospital room with a bouquet of roses and sweet words Furihata was momentarily elated and then he remembered Kyo’s explanation.

Suspension Bridge Effect. Intense situation, traumatic experience, confusion. Even if Akashi _did_ like him back _now_ , what if he was just confused too?

“I,” Akashi had said, regal as a king, “have never been confused about anything in my life.”

Furihata had smiled and his heart beat faster and he tried to remind himself about bridges.

But then Akashi told him he would wait for him, and then quoted Furihata’s favorite novel, and Furihata thought, _Oh._

*

So Furihata takes the time to clear his head and life slowly returns to normal. Time passes, he enters his Second Year of high school, life resumes the way it always does. He doesn’t see Akashi, but he talks to him on the phone once a week and they text and email throughout the day, everyday.

He didn’t think they’d have a lot to look post-abduction by mad scientists, but conversation is never a problem. They talk about basketball and books and their classmates. (Akashi has some hilarious stories about the Rakuzan team, although Furihata is never sure if he’s supposed to laugh or not, because Akashi always seems so serious with his reports.)

“Who are you texting?” Kyo says when he comes into the room, opening a bag of chips.

“What?” Furihata says, startling and nearly dropping his phone.

“You’re smiling like an idiot. This isn’t the first time, either. Did you get a girlfriend and not tell me?”

“Oh, um, no,” Furihata says, blushing. Then he mumbles, “I’m texting Akashi.”  
  
Kyo freezes. His arm stops in the middle of lifting a potato chip to his lips and it remains there, poised at the entrance of his mouth. He stares at Furihata, which Furihata resents, because he _told_ Kyo about Akashi! Kyo was the only one he _had_ told about Akashi! He shouldn’t look so surprised!

“Oh,” Kyo says in a strangled voice. “I didn’t—know you were still in contact with him.”

Furihata shrugs and does not look at his brother. “We text every now and then,” he says casually, which isn’t exactly false, but the understatement of it feels like the biggest lie he’s ever told.

“And—you still… like him?”

Furihata doesn’t know how to decipher that tone in his brother’s voice. He feels his face growing warm and his heart beating fast, and he can’t tell if it’s from anxiety or if it’s just his conditioned response to talking about Akashi. “Yeah. Yeah, I think I do.”

Kyo falls silent and Furihata risks a look up. Kyo jolts when Furihata meets his gaze and says, “Well, that’s great! Just… great. Cool. Right. Do you want potato chips? I feel like eating potato chips. I’m going to go buy some.”

“You mean like the ones you’re holding?”

Kyo jerks, looking at the chip in one hand and the bag in the other like he has no idea how they got there. “No, not these chips. These chips are no good. I need to go—get better ones.”

Kyo walks out the door.

Furihata is not feeling particularly supported right now.

*

Two days later Kyo ambushes Furihata in his room and asks, “Are you busy tonight?”

Furihata looks up from his homework. “….No?”

“We should hang out!”

“We should?”  

“Yeah! You, me, some of my friends from school.”

“Your friends?” Furihata says, feeling a little bit like a parrot.

“Yeah! Couple of girls, couple of dudes, it’ll be fun!” Kyo looks his younger brother and says, “Wear something nice and brush your hair.”

Furihata starts to have a bad feeling about this.

*

Kyo does not typically introduce his friends to Furihata, out of consideration.

When they were in middle school together, Kyo always made the conscientious effort to include his little brother in his social group. But Kyo’s social group was, for lack of a better phrase, completely out of Furihata’s league. The people Furihata hung out with were all beautiful, athletic, nice-smelling people who always look so fancy. They had a habit of staring at Furihata like they were wondering who this strange lost creature was that had wandered into their group. And after awhile Furihata just stopped hanging out with Kyo and his friends and he never really picked the habit back up when he went to a different high school.

Kyo, sensing that Furihata didn’t really get along with his friends, took care not to put him in the position where he’d have to feel like the odd guy out. And it was only worse after Kyo went to college—no university student in the world wanted to hang out with high school kids, and Furihata respected that.

So Furihata can’t help but feel like Kyo’s sudden invitation has ulterior motives.

But since things have been a little off between him and his brother lately, he wants to try and repair their relationship.

*

He instantly regrets his decision.

Furihata remembers all the reasons why he doesn’t like hanging out with his brother’s friends. Largely, because they’re all in love with Kyo.

That oversimplifies the matter. Kyo is the kind of person who’s always at the center of every crowd. He tells all the best stories, he makes everyone laugh, and everyone desperately fights for his attention. Even in the game center where they all decide to hang out and there are gleeful shouts and the clangs and chirps of various games, everyone still tries to vie for Kyo’s attention over the noise and chaos.

They do try to talk to Furihata—in the worst way possible. One girl pats him on the head and tells him he’s adorable, and another girl, actually pinches his cheeks.

The only thing that makes this slightly bearable is the fact that no one asks him about his abduction, but towards the end of the night Furihata realizes that _no one is asking about his abduction_ and it’s in such a pointed way that he _knows_ Kyo must have told them all not to talk about it.

Furihata is not… sure what to do with that… except it makes him feel like some pity charity case.

The only one who is remotely normal around him is his brother’s best friend, Harudori Minoru. Minoru takes the time to ask Furihata about his studies and his club and what it’s like at Seirin, and it all feels pretty normal except Minoru’s hand keeps brushing against his, and his leg keeps touching Furihata’s, and even thought Furihata keeps moving back so that they’re not crowded together it _keeps happening_ and it’s a little weird.

Furihata doesn’t want to make a big deal about it (he just likes his personal space, OK? And maybe he’s gotten more nervous in crowds since his _ordeal_ but he’s got this, he can totally be normal, this is fine.) So he talks about his Seirin teammates because that’s pretty much his default conversation topic when he doesn’t have anything else to say.

He’s in the middle of describing Kagami’s epic lunches and eating habits when Minoru casually, too casually, says, “I once dated a guy like that. He could eat everything on the table, and trying to keep my meals was practically a battle to the death.”

And then Furihata gets it.

And then he’s _pissed._

“Kyo-nii-san,” Furihata says loudly, getting up and grabbing his brother by the arm. “Can I talk to you for a second? _Alone?_ ”

“Sure,” Kyo says jovially, excusing himself from his friends and walking outside the game room with Furihata. “What’s up?”

“Are you trying to set me up with one of your friends?” Furihata demands. “Is this a blind date? Is that what’s happening here?”

“Kouki,” Kyo says, hurt, “You make that sound so conniving.”

“Maybe that’s because it’s a _little conniving._ ”

“What? How can you say that? I just thought, you know, you needed to meet new people. You’ve never been in a relationship before, so I thought I’d help you meet someone.”

“And where was this generosity when I spent years trying to get a girlfriend?” Furihata demands.

Kyo looks at him, mildly intrigued. “Oh, do you still like girls? ‘Cuz I could probably arrange something, if you’re interested.”

“No! I mean, yes, I still like girls, but no, that’s not what I meant, don’t do that—”

“Oh good, I wasn’t actually sure I knew a girl who’d be interested. Besides, Minoru’s a great guy, super nice, he’s smart too, you know? I think you have a lot in common. Besides, he thinks you’re cute.”

“—He does?” Furihata startles, momentarily derailed by his instinctive flattered response to anyone thinking he was cute, but then he mentally kicked himself and refocused on his outrage. “Wait, that’s not the point! Are you telling me you actually _don’t_ care that I like guys now?”

“Kouki,” Kyo says, sounding genuinely hurt this time, his voice softening, “Of _course not._ You’re my little brother, dude, I’m going to love you no matter what.”

The surge of brotherly love and relief replaces Furihata’s outrage, and then gradually eases into generalized befuddlement. “Wait, then why are you throwing your friend at me? You know I like Akashi.”

Only because he’s watching his brother very closely, Furihata notices Kyo’s slight wince. “Yes, well, I just thought you should know you have options. I don’t think you should rush into things. You’re still recovering, and I think you’re still confused—”

“I’m _not_ confused!” Furihata blurts out. “Kyo-nii, it’s been almost two months now. And I still like him—”

“You _think_ you like him,” Kyo interrupts. “Because you haven’t met anyone else. But Minoru’s such a great guy, Kouki. I really think you two would be good together.”

“I don’t want to just date _any_ guy, I want to date Akashi!” Furihata protests. “Why are you being like this?"  
  
“Because he got you abducted and shot, that’s why!” Kyo yells.

Furihata takes a step back, a few passerbys stop and stare. Kyo clenches his fists and sets his jaw. Furihata hasn’t ever seen his brother like this; Kyo doesn’t _yell._

“Kyo-nii-san,” Furihata says, his voice gentle and pleading. “That wasn’t his fault.”

“That was _all_ his fault!” Kyo says, no longer shouting but still loud enough to draw a few stares. “You wouldn’t have been taken if he hadn’t been with you at the time, and you were only shot because you were protecting _him_ so don’t try and bullshit and say it wasn’t his fault when he had _everything_ to do with it.”

“You… you know about that?” Furihata says, his voice strange in his own ears. _He_ hadn’t told anyone he’d been shot because he’d jumped in front of Akashi.

“ _He_ told us,” Kyo says venomously. “He came by and apologized, like that could ever make up for the fact that you _almost died._ ” Kyo shakes at the memory, like he’s trying to restrain himself from hitting something, which makes Furihata wonder if his brother _had_ tried to punch Akashi. (And what a terrible idea _that_ would have been.)

Furihata flounders. On the one hand, he can’t exactly deny Kyo’s furious accusation. Put it that way, Furihata wouldn’t have been abducted, much less shot, if Akashi hadn’t been involved. But on the other hand, Furihata had willingly flung himself into the fire both times, and he doesn’t like the way Kyo ignores the existence of Furihata’s free will.

“He saved me too,” Furihata says quietly. “I wouldn’t have made it out of there, if it wasn’t for Akashi. And I _like_ him, Kyo-nii, I’m in _love_ with him, I want—”

“You fall in love with everyone,” Kyo snaps, “You’ll get over it the next time someone smiles at you.”  
Furihata reels back. His whole body freezes and he feels heavy and cast adrift at the same time, like a stone plummeting to the bottom of the sea.

_Is that really what you think of me?_

But he can’t say it. He can’t say anything at the moment.

Kyo, realizing that he’d gone too far, mutters, “Sorry. Look, just not _him,_ OK? You can date anyone but him.”

Furihata still can’t speak. If he does, he’ll start crying and that would just be awkward for everyone.

Before, Furihata could just walk away whenever he didn’t want anyone to see him cry; he could just walk off and find some secluded spot and cry until he felt better.

Kyo won’t let him do that, now. His whole family has been extra careful not to leave Furihata alone. (Even though, he has explained, it was _exceedingly_ unlikely he’d be abducted _twice_ in one lifetime. His family had not appreciated his attempts at logic.)

“Come on,” Kyo says, grabbing Furihata by his shoulder and maneuvering him forward. “We should go back.”

*

Furihata flees to the bathroom and calls Akashi.

“Furi,” Akashi answers the phone after one ring, his voice rich with pleasure but also possessing an undercurrent of concern. Furihata shivers when Akashi says his name—no one has ever said his name in the way Akashi does. “What is wrong?”

“Nothing,” Furihata replies. “Nothing. Everything. Sorry, sorry for the weird phone call.”

“Furihata,” Akashi says, sharper and more urgent. “Are you in danger?”

“No, no sorry,” Furihata says. He’s crouched in the bathroom of a game center and feeling utterly wretched. He shouldn’t have called Akashi, but he really needed to hear his voice right now. “It’s Kyo—my brother? He sort of ambushed me with a blind date with one of his college friends. And we had a fight and I’m really mad at him, but also, ugh, trying to be understanding?”

What if Kyo was _right?_ Well, he _was_ right, wasn’t he? Furihata fell in love pretty easy, he always did. And he got over heartbreak pretty quickly and moved on to the next crush just as fast.

But _Akashi_ , Akashi _was_ different. _This_ was different. Furihata doesn’t _want_ to “get over” what he feels for Akashi. He wanted to keep it forever, and cherish it like the infinitely precious thing these feelings were.

Akashi, Furihata notes, had fallen very silent and hasn’t said anything in at least a minute.

“Akashi?” Furihata questions.

“My apologies. I was lost in thought,” Akashi says pleasantly.

Furihata has talked a lot with Akashi these past two months, and he’s gotten to know him pretty well. He’s come to recognize when Akashi uses polite pleasantries to make homicidal intent.

“—Akashi?” he asks, uncertain.

“A fight with your brother, you say? I’m sorry, I don’t really have the proper background to relate. I always win all my arguments with the other Miracles.”

Furihata chokes back a laugh, trying to picture Akashi squabbling with the other Miracles.

“It’s OK. It’s just—brother stuff, I guess. I just can’t believe he tried to hook me up with one of his soccer friends. It’s weird. Although I guess I should be glad he supports my newfound bisexuality.”

There was another silence and Furihata wonders if he angered the Miracle.

Akashi, Furihata realizes, hasn’t said anything regarding any romantic inclinations these past two months. He had _said_ he would wait for Furihata’s head to clear, but what if he’d changed his mind? What if he realized he wasn’t interested in dating Furihata after all?

Now Furihata is upset with his brother, crouched in a men’s bathroom of a game center, _and_ depressed.

“I am sure you will resolve things with your brother soon,” Akashi says finally, still with that masked pleasant voice of his. “Your brother loves you. Also, are you free this Sunday?”

“What?” Furihata says, jolting at the sudden change in topic. “Uh. Yes? Yes, I am. Totally free.”

“I will be in Tokyo that day. It would be nice to see you again.”

Furihata’s heart accelerates at the thought. “Oh. I’d like that.”

“Wonderful. I will see you then.”

*

Akashi seethes. He thinks it is a very good thing that no one else is around him at the moment, because he is feeling very murderous and undoubtedly any encounter right now would end in bloodshed.

He counts to ten. Then he counts to ten again. And again. Then he wonders why anyone ever thought counting to ten was supposed to help in dispelling rage because it’s doing nothing for him and now he thinks whoever said that should be killed in a most horrible and slow fashion.

He had been very good and very patient. He had been very impressed with his own restraint, because it was a demonstration of heretofore unseen temperance and serenity in the face of adversity. Everyday that he has been patient and composed feels like a demonstration of his own humanity; something he hadn’t thought necessary before but he was now trying to maintain.

But _now_. Now there is an _interloper._

He curses himself for his own complacency. He hadn’t even considered the possibility of a rival! While he has been patient and maintained his distance, some soccer playing university student was honing in on Furihata and this could not be allowed!

His first instinct is, of course, to quietly dispatch his rival in a murderous but efficient removal. But he is slowly learning that his first instinct is not always right.

Besides, he’s pretty sure he knows who the real threat to his intended relationship with Furihata is, and that’s the problem that should be focused on.

_Furihata Kyo._

Akashi scowls as he thinks about the way Furihata’s brother has _already_ interfered with Akashi’s relationship. Akashi knows that the elder Furihata does not approve of him, and if Akashi doesn’t figure out a way around that, he will never successfully court Furihata.

Which presents him with two problems, really. The first is that he is still not sure Furihata wants to be in a relationship with him, and he still doesn’t fully know what the best way to court a human is. The second problem is that even if he _can_ properly romance Furihata, there is a very good chance Furihata’s friends and family will disapprove so much Furihata will cave in the face of their influence.

To sum up: he can’t just seduce Furihata, he has to seduce all of Furihata’s social network and he’s not entirely sure how to do either.

But in all things, Akashi is determined to win. He has a problem and he is going to solve his problem. He is absolute. He is victorious in all things. He is Akashi Seijuurou, he can do anything.

…He is probably going to need some outside help.

*

“No,” Mayuzumi says instantly, before Akashi can say anything.

“Mayuzumi-san, you have no idea what I’m here for,” Akashi says pleasantly.

“I know I’ve graduated, which means I officially don’t have to listen to you about anything.”

Akashi looks at him pointedly but doesn’t say anything.

Mayuzumi sighs. “What is it this time?”

“I need your advice on how to seduce a human and his friends and family.”

“Oh God, I regret my life,” Mayuzumi rubs his eyes with one hand like he has a headache. “Akashi, I have explained this to you, I know I have explained this to you, but I am way too asexual for this shit. I have zero experience or inclination that could help provide insight into your libido, so please stop asking me. Ask the Kings, they’re a horny bunch, they would _love_ to help you out.”

“No. I refuse. Also, don’t get them involved this time, last time was humiliating enough.” Akashi adds just the right amount of emphasis to his command that he knows Mayuzumi will have to obey even without it being a proper Order.

“Can you explain what exactly I did to get elected your official spokesperson for humanity? So maybe I could stop doing it?”

“You read a lot. I am given to understand those who read possess a keen insight into differing viewpoints and subject matter.”

Mayuzumi says quietly to himself in a mournful fashion, “Books, how could you betray me like this?”

“If you do not wish to help I will not burden you,” Akashi says stiffly.

Mayuzumi sighs again, louder this time. “No, I’ll hear you out at least. What exactly is your problem? You talk to that Furihata kid all the time, right? So it’s not like he’s scared of you anymore.”

“Yes,” Akashi acknowledges. “But we have not addressed the possibility of a romance in awhile, because I did not wish to press the issue while he was still recovering. And while I have read a few novels that focus on the myriad courtship rituals, I am—”

“Wait. Wait. Did you just confess to reading _romance novels?_ ” Mayuzumi interrupts in delighted glee.

Akashi’s eyebrow twitches. “Yes, for research purposes. I believe in being thorough.”

“Oh sure, naturally,” Mayuzumi says, smirking. “Research.”

“ _Anyway,_ ” Akashi says loudly, “Those novels only make me realize the abnormality of my own situation. I am not human and therefore I do not believe the courtship methods in books would serve as proper guidelines.”

Mayuzumi’s lips twitch. “As it happens, I _do_ know there’s a _whole_ subgenre of romance novels that specifically deal with human-nonhuman courtship rituals. Have you read _Twilight?”_

“I have not. Is it good?”

“It’s educational, that’s for sure,” Mayuzumi says, solemnly, “At any rate, I do see your conundrum. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not trying to wheedle out of helping you out here, but I really don’t think I could provide valuable insight into the situation. And I can’t help but point out that you _do_ know people who have direct experience with this sort of thing.”

“I told you, I don’t want the Uncrowned Kings involved, I do not believe their advice has merit, none of them ever dated anyone for longer than three weeks.”

“Fair point, but I was talking about the other Miracles.”

Akashi shuts his mouth with a “click” and doesn’t say anything for three whole minutes.

“They _are_ dating humans, right?”

Akashi still doesn’t say anything.

“And _they’re_ not human either, so it sort of seems like they have experience with your direct situation, right?”

Akashi scowls but does not reply.

“ _Riiiiight?”_

“Yes, fine, right, they probably do,” Akashi snaps.

Mayuzumi raises a brow.

Akashi huffs. They were _his_ Generation! He was their leader! He doesn’t need romantic advice from his fellow Projects! That would be like admitting they knew more than he did!

Mayuzumi is very judgey with his silence.

“Fine!” Akashi throws his hands in the air. “I’ll ask them! Are you happy?”

“Very,” Mayuzumi says. “When you get married I expect to be the best man at your wedding.”

“You were useless, you will be lucky if I even invite you to my wedding.”

*

Akashi reads _Twilight._

Mayuzumi is definitely not invited to his wedding.

*

The logical next step is to arrive in Tokyo early so he can confer with the other Miracles. His guardian has a private helicopter that Akashi can use at will so he just kidnaps Murasakibara along the way and sends a summoning email out to the rest of the Miracles.

He wants a private meeting with them, so he rents out a Karaoke room, like they had done before during one of their crisis councils.

Murasakibara is remarkably unimpressed with his abduction. He quietly eats his snacks as the others pile into the room, not asking questions. Akashi has always liked that about the Purple Miracle.

“Akashicchi!” Kise wails, “What’s wrong? Are we in danger again?”

“No,” Akashi says.

“It’s not Teiko again, is it?” Aomine says, scratching his head.

“Of course not! I took care of that!” Momoi huffs. “I was very thorough this time!”

“This has nothing to do with Teiko; if we were in danger I would have entered a Code phrase,” he points out. He focuses in on the person who came in with Kuroko and he is mildly irked since he’d rather deliberately not invited him along for this. “What are you doing here?”

“Eh? Can’t I be here? I thought this was a Miracle problem,” Hinata Shouyou says.

“No, it’s—” Akashi bites off the rest, not wanting to admit that since he didn’t _know_ Hinata (he had never been all that close with Orange, and the seven years that have passed since he’d last seen the flying Miracle meant that they were virtually strangers now. Akashi must admit his task is embarrassing enough without having to talk in front of someone he doesn’t know all that well.)

“Shouyou-kun was visiting me,” Kuroko explains passively. “And since your message directly forbade the presence of our human boyfriends, I thought perhaps this matter concerned Shouyou-kun as well, so I brought him along. Should I not have?”

Kuroko and Hinata both manage to look like injured puppies.

“No, of course not, Hinata is always welcome, he is a member of our Generation,” Akashi says.

“What is this about, Akashi?” Midorima asks irritably. “If we are not in danger, I fail to see why we needed to meet in private.”

Akashi tries very hard not to blush. (He is their leader and an elite soldier. He will not blush. It is beneath him.) He says, with as much dignity as he can muster given the circumstances, “I need your advice on how to properly court a human.”

Everyone stares at him.

Then Aomine and Kise burst out laughing.

“Oh man, good one, Akashi!” Aomine says, wiping tears from his eyes. “What are we really here for?”

“Man, and I always thought you couldn’t tell jokes!” Kise chuckles.

“I can tell jokes just fine,” Akashi says indignantly. “But I am not joking now. You all found partners, so I am here to ask you how you accomplished that.”

Everyone stares at him again.

“Seriously?” Kise says.

“Yes, seriously.” Akashi tries counting to ten again. That method _really_ doesn’t work.

“Whoa. Weird,” Hinata says.

“ _Who?”_ Midorima gapes.

Akashi scowls because he figures it should be obvious. “Furihata Kouki.”

“Whaaat?” Murasakibara drawls. “The kid you got abducted with?”

“How long has this been going on?” Midorima asks.

“I have been interested in him for awhile,” he says. He fixes his gaze on Kuroko, who has been suspiciously quiet. “ _You_ do not seem surprised.”

“I am not. Furihata-kun has told me that you and he have been communicating.”

Akashi bites back the urge to ask, “Has he said anything about me? What has he said?” The curiosity is killing him but he won’t give Kuroko the satisfaction of asking.

“You’re serious, Akashicchi?”

“Yes,” Akashi says. This was somewhat also why he hadn’t wanted to go to them for advice. “I would like to initiate a relationship, but I am not sure what the best approach in doing that is. So I want to know how _you_ all did it. Murasakibara?”

“Eh? Murochin kissed me first and then we had sex. That was nice.”

“ _Whoa,”_ Hinata says again. Midorima and Kise look wrathfully at Murasakibara, suggesting that their own relationship had not progressed as easily or as quickly.

“Well, that is useless for me. Kise? I know you were pining after Kasamatsu-san for quite some time.”

“I was! Ages! Ages and ages, Murasakibaracchi, I kind of hate you.”

Murasakibara shrugs, singularly unconcerned with all of this.

“So how did you finally win his heart?”

“Oh. Well,” Kise clears his throat, “Well, I guess, _technically,_ Senpai made the first move. But only after he found out I liked him!”

“You told him, then?” Akashi presses.

“Uhhh. No. Apparently everyone else did.”

“I will not be much help either,” Midorima offers. “Takao confessed and kissed me first as well.”

“I’m not even sure why I’m here,” Aomine says, “ _I’m_ not dating a human.”

“I needed Momoi and you’re a package deal,” Akashi says.

“Oi!”

“Hinata, _do_ you have any advice?” Akashi asks, getting desperate.

Hinata scrunches his nose in thought. “Kageyama and I just sorta started kissing? I’m not even sure how that happened. And then we just sort of kept kissing? It’s not really all that complicated.”

“ _None_ of you kissed your boyfriend first?” Akashi asks incredulously.

“ _I_ did,” Kuroko says. Akashi looks at him in hope but then Kuroko continues with, “But Kagami-kun had already confessed his love.”

Akashi leans back and stares at horror in his Generation. “Do you mean to tell me that out of all of you, not a single one of you _actually_ courted your boyfriend? You just let them do all the work?”

“Hey!” Kise says, lurching forward. “Don’t make it sound so easy!”

“That _is_ easy! You didn’t do anything! If it were up to all of you, you’d still be single!”

“Hey, I had a plan!” Kise says petulantly. “I was going to make a move eventually. It was just—a really _long_ plan, OK? I wasn’t going to rush things.”

“You don’t have room to judge, Akashi,” Midorima defends. “The fact that _we_ all found boyfriends first made it easy for you. But we had no way of knowing that our feelings could be reciprocated.”

“I _absolutely_ can judge,” Akashi returns. “I cannot believe how cowardly you all are. Nothing would ever stop me from pursuing his affections; I would not be so scared to find happiness.”

“Oh yeah?” Kise challenges. “Then why do you need _us?_ ”

“Apparently I don’t!” Akashi says, frustrated.

(“Are things always this intense when you guys get together?” he hears Hinata ask.

“Yes. Pretty much always,” Kuroko replies.)

Asking the Miracles had been a useless endeavor from the start. He should have known better. Then he remembers there’s still one last thing they could help him with. So he reins in his temper and asks, “How do you handle their family’s disapproval?”

Everyone stares at him, looking like bewildered sheep.

“You are not human,” he reminds them. “Surely the human families of your human lovers have something to say about mutants dating someone precious to them? Kise, I know Youji-san has been in your corner for awhile—”

“He has! He’s been giving me tips on how to seduce his son since I was fifteen!”

“—so you’ll be no help, but what about the rest of you?”

“Kageyama’s parents _love_ me,” Hinata says. “They talk about how they wish I was their son all the time.”

Hinata was the most human out of all of them, so this doesn’t come as a surprise.

“Takao’s father is not in the picture, but his mother is very supportive. Takao tells me she wanted us to be friends from the beginning.”

Takao Nobuko worked at the JSDF base as a nurse, so like Kasamatsu Youji, she is not an accurate representation of most human parents to the Miracles. Akashi is a little irritated by how easy Kise and Midorima had it. He can’t believe his only hope is Murasakibara and Kuroko. He looks at the Purple Miracle.

“Mm. Murochin’s parents don’t approve, but Murochin doesn’t get along with them. He says it’s because I have a dick, not because I’m a mutant. So Murochin says we don’t need to meet them, ever.”

Akashi looks at Kuroko, without much optimism. “Kagami-kun’s parents do not have a big role in his life,” Kuroko explains. “So I am not sure they care one way or another about my existence as Kagami-kun’s lover. I have met Alexandra Garcia, though, and she enthusiastically approves.”

Murasakibara points and nods at Kuroko while eating a maiubo as if to say, “Yes, same here” when he finishes eating he manages, “She’s nice. She walks around naked a lot and sometimes tries to kiss me.”

Kuroko nods thoughtfully. “Yes. She does do that.”

Akashi leans back in the cushioned seat. “Let me get this straight. Out of all of you who are dating humans, not a single one of you made the first move _or_ had to deal with the disapproval of their family?”

“Pine after someone unrequitedly for three years and _then_ tell me how easy I had it,” Kise growls.

“Maybe it’s not so bad for you, either!” Hinata says brightly. “You don’t _know_ his family disapproves, do you?”

“Oh no,” Kuroko interjects before Akashi can reply, “They most decidedly disapprove. So do most of Furihata-kun’s friends.”

Akashi glares at Kuroko. If looks could kill, Kuroko would be six feet under. “What do you know?”

Kuroko just meets his gaze, unimpressed.

*

Furihata’s logical next step was to enlist the aid of his friends.

He had refrained from telling them about his feelings for Akashi up until now, because it was so deeply personal he hadn’t wanted to share them with anyone.

But his outrage at Kyo pretty much annihilates any inhibitions he might have had about discussing Akashi with his friends.

He starts with his usual lunch crowd, because he trusts Fukuda and Kawahara, and also because he really wants Tsuchida and Aya’s advice on the matter.

“And Kyo-nii _refuses_ to listen to my side of things,” Furihata concludes. “He just keeps insisting Akashi’s no good for me and won’t _listen._ ”

There’s a long pause after he reaches the end of his rant.

Fukuda, Kawahara and Tsuchida all looks at Aya, designating Tsuchida’s girlfriend as their spokesperson.

“Well,” Aya says delicately, “Furi-kun, your brother has a point.”

“What?!” Furihata yelps at this betrayal; he hadn’t even considered the possibility that his friends wouldn’t be on his side.

“Dude, you _were_ kidnapped,” Fukuda says.

“Once! Only once! And that is very unlikely to happen again!”

“I feel like once was enough, man,” Kawahara says. “And the chances of it happening again go up if you’re around that guy more, don’t you think?”

“No!” Furihata says indignantly. But he’s actually a little surprised by how well his friends are taking his newfound sexuality, so he shifts tactics for a bit to ask, “You guys don’t seem all that surprised by the fact that I like Akashi.”

“Eh,” Kawahara shrugs, “After one teammate falls in love with a superpowered mutant, it’s less surprising the second time it happens.”

Hard to argue with that logic really, and it offers Furihata a new avenue to attack, “But see, that’s my point; we’re all friends with _Kuroko_ and that’s perfectly safe! No one tells _Kagami_ he shouldn’t date Kuroko!”

“That’s different,” Tsuchida protests.

“ _How?”_

“Kuroko is our teammate and Akashi is a scary motherfucker,” Kawahara says.

Furihata can’t really argue with that logic either. It would be a lie to try and say that Akashi is not, in fact, a scary motherfucker, even if Furihata himself isn’t frightened of him anymore.

“We’re not saying you shouldn’t date him, Furi-kun,” Aya says carefully.

“Well, we are saying that, a little bit,” Fukuda puts in.

“But maybe you shouldn’t be so hard on your brother. He only wants what’s best for you.”  
Furihata wants that too. He’s just pretty sure the best thing for him is Akashi.

“Just be careful, OK?” Aya says, her voice gentle. “I understand that you feel strongly about him, but none of your friends really know him, so you can’t blame us for being worried.”

Furihata nods, because that does make a lot of sense.

Clearly, he should have started with his friend who _did_ know Akashi.

*

“Furi, Furi _no,_ ” Kagami says, sounding horrified.

Furihata scowls. The problem with talking to Kuroko was that it was virtually impossible to get to him alone. The Miracle’s relationship with Kagami was adorable, enviable, everything Furihata had ever wanted in a romance, but also creepily co-dependant. Considering they lived together, went to school together, sat near each other in class _and_ had the same club activities, Furihata would have assumed they’d want a break from each other every now and then but they still pretty much spent all their free time together.

“I’m not talking to you,” Furihata says. “Although I’d have thought you’d be a little more open-minded considering you’re dating Kuroko.”

“Dude, he tried to stab me with scissors! You were there! I think I’m a little justified with my concern, OK?”

“…Fair,” Furihata says reluctantly. He shifts his attention to Kuroko, who hasn’t said anything until now. He looks at Kuroko desperately and begs, “You don’t think it’s a problem, right Kuroko? He’s your friend, too.”

He has never wished he could read Kuroko’s expressionless face more than right now. He has no idea what his fellow teammate is thinking.

“I believe that Furihata-kun would not be in danger, if you were dating Akashi-kun,” Kuroko acknowledges. “Akashi-kun is very protective of the people in his life. I am sure he would do everything in his power to keep you from harm.”

“Right!” Furihata says triumphantly. “That’s exactly what I think! Thank you!” It’s a light bulb moment—once the thought occurs, Furihata marvels at the illumination. _This_ is what he believes; this is what he wishes everyone else would understand.

Akashi _is_ scary. But Furihata has never felt so safe as when he was with him.

The whole abduction _ordeal_ had been the most terrifying experience of Furihata’s life (he feels pretty secure in hoping it’s the most terrifying thing that will ever happen to him), and Akashi had been there with him, protecting him.

_“I am scary, Kouki. I am the scariest creature in this facility, and I am on your side. You have nothing to worry about.”_

“But there are dangers, Furihata-kun,” Kuroko says, breaking through Furihata’s triumphant epiphany. “There are dangers to dating a Miracle, and I would be remiss if I did not point that out. It is something I wish had been made clear to the other human boyfriends, before they got too involved.”

“Oi, idiot,” Kagami says, his voice rough as he looks down at his boyfriend with an infinitely tender expression. (It embarrasses Furihata, he feels instinctively that he shouldn’t be witnessing this affection.) “I don’t regret a single damn thing, you hear? I’d do whatever it takes to stay by your side—fight anyone, hell, fight everyone! I’m sure Tatsuya and the others feel the same way.”

 “Thank you, Kagami-kun,” Kuroko says quietly.

“Others?” Furihata asks, mostly to remind his two friends that he’s still around, because he’s pretty sure any minute now they’re going to start making out. “There are other people dating Miracles besides you, Kagami?”

“Oh yeah, lots. Practically a club at this point. Takao keeps threatening to make us T-shirts.”

“Himuro and Takao?” Furihata exclaims. “You’re kidding!”

“And Kasamatsu from Kaijo. And that grumpy volleyball kid,” Kagami clarifies.

Furihata blinks. “Are all the Miracles gay?”

“Except Aomine-kun and Momoi-san,” Kuroko says.

“Don’t ask,” Kagami adds.

Furihata decides he doesn’t need to ask. “What the hell, man? If everyone’s dating a Miracle I don’t see why it’s a big deal for me to do the same!”

“Because it _is_ dangerous for everyone,” Kuroko insists. “If I could go back in time and caution the others against involving themselves, I would. I believe you should be aware the danger will not end, Furihata-kun. You know better than anyone what the potential risks are. Those dangers are very unlikely to ever stop.”  
All of Furihata’s protests die in his throat. He’s been telling everyone that his _ordeal_ was a one-time thing, no repeats. That’s what he believes.

But what if it _wasn’t_?

And why is it that the whole world is telling him he shouldn’t be with Akashi? If everyone he knows feels this strongly, are they right?

“Just to be clear, no one _can_ actually time travel, right?” Kagami asks his boyfriend. “That’s not something Teiko designed?”

“Not to my knowledge,” Kuroko says.

“Oh good.”

Furihata’s read a lot of romance novels, he knows all about star-crossed lovers, but he never really thought he’d want to be in one. For one thing, it almost never goes well for the star-crossed pair. And he wouldn’t have thought he’d be the kind of person to still date someone everyone in his life was against. Before.

“Furihata-kun?” Kuroko asks quietly, startling Furihata out of his thoughts. “I apologize. I did not mean to cause you pain.”

“Oh, you didn’t! I’m—” Furihata suddenly realizes that he’s tearing up and he’s so embarrassed he immediately wishes he could die. He rubs his eyes and tries to laugh. “It’s a pointless conversation anyway. I don’t even know if Akashi still likes me that way.”

“I am fairly certain he does,” Kuroko says firmly.

_Oh,_ Furihata thinks.

*

“Let me get this straight,” Akashi says, vengeance in his voice. “Not only were you actively dissuading Furihata-kun from being my lover, you were _also_ of the opinion that _none_ of us should have a human boyfriend?”

“I did not say that,” Kuroko corrects.

“That’s exactly what you said!” Kise says. “My God, Kuroko. You are the worst.” Everyone notes the missing ‘cchi’ at the end of Kuroko’s name.

“I am only lobbying for an awareness. Every single one of our lovers were actively threatened or put in harm’s way during the fiasco with Jabberwocky, Gray and Green 7284. None of us here can guarantee that they will not be in danger because of us again. The next time someone tries to abduct a Miracle, they might decide kidnapping our lover is the easiest way to accomplish that. The next time our past ghosts come back to haunt us, who is to say they will not target our lovers first?”

Kuroko does not deliver many speeches but when he does, they always have more impact. Every single person in the room—even, curiously, Aomine and Momoi—look like Kuroko just gutted them with a fishing knife.

“We are all aware of that,” Midorima seethes. “You do not need to tell us the dangers. There is nothing I would not do to keep him safe.”

“I know,” Kuroko says, but he fixes his gaze on Akashi. “I know that is true for all of us. I am only explaining why Furihata-kun’s friends and family are rightly concerned for his well-being.”

Akashi leans back in his seat, considering. Kuroko is challenging him in some way, but Akashi isn’t quite sure what the other boy expects him to do.

He _thinks_ Kuroko is suggesting that the right thing to do would be to let Furihata go. The considerate thing to do for the one he loves would be to stay out of his life entirely. That certainly _sounds_ like what Kuroko is trying to say.

But everything Akashi knows about Kuroko goes against this theory. Kuroko has always, always lobbied for human connections, there is absolutely no way Kuroko regrets the fact that the other Miracles started dating humans. He was more relieved that anyone by the changes in their Generation that occurred once the Miracles all found partners.

The better man might bow out, Akashi thinks. Regardless of Kuroko’s intentions, Akashi is fully aware that the best thing for Furihata might be a human lover. He would be safer that way.

But then he thinks about soccer playing university students and thinks, _I am not that good of a person._

He wants Furihata and he’s going to do everything he can to get him.

Kuroko has, at the very least, given him a few ideas about how to go about doing this. He now has a better picture for his plan of attack.

So he smiles and says, “Thank you, Kuroko. You have given me many things to consider. The rest of you were useless.”

“I’m not coming the next time you email us,” Midorima says.

“We both know that’s a lie,” Akashi says. “Momoi, a word? I have a few things I need to consult with you about. The rest of you can go home.”

“I am _definitely_ not coming next time,” Kise mutters.

“You guys are super intense,” Hinata says. “I mean, _seriously_ intense. Lighten up, everyone. Death and destruction isn’t looming around ever corner.”

“In our defense, death and destruction tends to loom in an awful lot of corners,” Kise says glumly.

“It is perhaps easier for you to be optimistic, Shouyou-kun,” Kuroko says. “Your lover has never been hurt because of you.”

“Not true! I hit him in the back of a head with a volleyball once.”

“I do not think that counts.”

“I also punched him a couple of times.”

“Eh. That doesn’t count either. Hinachin’s punches don’t hurt very much,” Murasakibara drawls.

“That’s true, Shouyou,” Aomine says, “You’re so tiny. Your punches probably don’t even compare much to an ordinary human’s.”

“You guys are jerks. I’m not coming next time either.”

Akashi smirks. He is 100% confident they will all still come next time.

“What did you need?” Momoi asks as the others begin to file out of the Karaoke room.

“The same thing I always need from you, Momoi,” Akashi says smoothly. “Intelligence analysis.”

“You want me to stalk your boyfriend, don’t you?”

“And everyone he knows, please.”


	2. Chapter 2

Akashi purposefully arranges to meet Furihata at the other boy’s house. He knows Furihata’s mother will be home and very probably his older brother. Furihata had sent a cautious text back, _I’m not sure that’s a good idea,_ to which Akashi confidently replied, _It’ll be fine._

He has a plan, now. He has Momoi’s carefully gathered data and he has multiple credit cards with almost unlimited credit lines. The only way to do this is to attack his problem face on.

He rings the doorbell and can hear the frantic thumping coming from inside the house. Furihata opens the door seconds after the bell rang a little out of breath from running to be at there first.

“Hi Akashi!” he says, smiling brightly. He steps outside, trying to close the door behind him. “We should go out now, yeah?”

“Nonsense, Furi,” Akashi says, smiling pleasantly. “I brought presents for your mother. It would be rude of me not to introduce myself.”

“Oh, but—” Furihata starts, looking dismayed.

Akashi gently pushes past him. His heart unexpectedly beats faster; this close to the other boy he can smell him, feel the heat off his body, and it conjures up memories of when their bodies were entwined and they were both desperate to touch. He hasn’t been this close to Furihata in ages and he didn’t anticipate his own reaction to the proximity. He wants to touch; touch and keep touching and never let go.

( _Patience,_ he admonishes himself. _You must be patient._ )

“What are _you_ doing here?” Furihata Kyo demands as he comes into the room.

“Kyo, don’t be rude,” Furihata’s mother chides her eldest son, but she flicks her gaze back to Akashi nervously, like she’s not sure what to do with his presence in her living room. “Hello, Akashi-kun.”

“Greetings,” Akashi says. “It is lovely to see you again, Furihata-san. I brought these for you, as thanks for your hospitality.” He holds out a bouquet of sunflowers—her favorite, according to Momoi’s intel—and the present he had acquired before coming.

The flowers surprise her and Akashi can see the moment her eyes soften as she accepts the bouquet. Then her eyes widen when she sees his gift and she says, “Oh my, no, I couldn’t accept this!”

“Nonsense,” Akashi says, “Furihata-kun is always telling me how hard you work around the house; you deserve to have luxurious things.” The combination foot bath and massage spa machine was top of the line—not something the average family could afford, but something Momoi had assured him was an item the woman had looked up online many times to check if it ever went on sale. He can see her resolve waiver and he goes in for the kill, “It is something I would have liked to give my _own_ mother, if I ever had one. Furihata-kun’s stories about you always make me think about what it would be like, if I had grown up with a mom.”

“Oh! You poor boy, of course! In that case, I can’t say no, can I? Please, come in and sit down, I will make you some tea.”

“Thank you,” Akashi says, at the same time Kyo says, “Mom! Don’t let him manipulate you!”

“Hush, Kyo, if you can’t be polite to our guest, then go to your room.”

“ _Mom,_ he is trying to buy your affections!”

“ _Kyo,_ ” she warns.

The elder Furihata glares wrathfully at Akashi. Akashi is not impressed. He sits at the kitchen table next to Furihata and smiles encouragingly at the other boy. “You don’t mind if we stay and what for a little bit, do you? Our movie doesn’t start for another hour.”

“Uh…no?” Furihata says, flicking his eyes from Akashi to his mother.

“Excellent,” Akashi says, turning his attention back to Furihata’s mother. “Furihata-kun tells me you are a fan of Korean dramas. Have you watched _My Name is Kim Sam-Soon?_ ”

“Of course! That’s one of my favorites! You watch K-dramas?”

He does now. “Of course, I find them very entertaining, and I am learning to speak the language.”

“How fascinating!”

*

By the time they have to leave, Furihata’s mother is calling him Sei-kun and giving him recommendations on what to watch next. She tells her son to grab a jacket, which Furihata groans and obeys with the beleaguered air of a son who has long since learned that it was just easier to grab a jacket than to try and argue that he wouldn’t need one.

 Akashi waits at the door, feeling very smug with how well that went.

“I know what you’re doing,” Kyo says, the college student looms over him. Akashi resists the urge to ankle-break him down to size.

“Do you?” he replies, unruffled.

“You may have my mom and Kouki fooled, but I know what you are.”

“And what am I?” Akashi says coolly. He wants to Order this boy away, but that would be cheating. (And _could_ he? Furihata is immune, maybe his brother is too. He wants to test this, he wants to find out. But that would be wrong, that would upset Furihata, he has to remain calm.)

“You’re a monster,” Kyo says bluntly. “And I’m not letting you anywhere near my little brother.”

Akashi twitches. Oh, how he wants to remove this man.

And he knows he should be on his best behavior, he knows he needs to win Kyo over if he wants a lasting relationship with Furihata, so he says, “You need not worry, Furihata-san. I intend to be very respectful towards your brother.”

But then, because Kyo is still looking at him like he’s scum, and Akashi still hasn’t forgiven him for cockblocking his relationship before it could even start, he can’t resist adding, “I intend to thoroughly respect him for hours and in multiple positions.”

“Why you little—”

“OK Akashi! I’m ready to go!” Furihata interrupts, bounding down the stairs, jacket in hand. “Bye Kyo!”

“ _Kouki,_ ” Kyo starts.

“I have my cellphone! We’ll be home before Ten.” Furihata grabs Akashi’s arm and pulls him out the door.

Akashi can’t resist sending one last triumphant smirk at Kyo’s direction as they exit the house.

*

“You know, Akashi, I don’t remember telling you all those things about my mother,” Furihata says once they’re outside.

“Really?” Akashi says innocently. “You must be mistaken. You have told me a lot of things over these past months.”

Furihata just smiles fondly at him.

*

They go to a movie, because that is what Akashi understands you’re supposed to do on dates. He thinks it’s a dumb idea, personally. He would much rather be doing something that would let him talk to Furihata (how is he supposed to convince the other boy his personal happiness depends on him dating Akashi if he can’t talk?) and he doesn’t even understand the point of going to a movie theater with another person, it’s a very singular activity, no other people required, but then the lights go out and he thinks, _Oh, I see the appeal now._

Because in the dark all he can think about is Furihata. How close he is, the sounds of his breathing, how easy it would be to reach out and take his hand in his. Their arms brush up against each others occasionally on the rest between them. If Akashi held Furihata’s hand in this theater, no one around them would know. Which of course makes him think about all the other things he could be doing in this theater and no one would know in the dark.

Furihata’s arm stays next to Akashi’s on the mutual hand rest between them. This emboldens Akashi and so he gives into impulse and takes Furihata’s hand in his. Furihata jolts in surprise but doesn’t pull away. Instead, he squeezes Akashi’s hand in return and they stay like that for the rest of the movie.

Akashi has no idea what the film was even about.

*

They’re supposed to get dinner afterwards; Akashi has a reservation at a very swanky Five Star restaurant and everything. But after the movie all Akashi can think about is how empty his hand feels now that Furihata’s isn’t in it anymore and he throws all his plans to be patient out the window.

They haven’t talked about romance; not since that first confession in Furihata’s hospital room. But Akashi feels like he has plenty of reason to feel confident in his chances so he opens his mouth to say, “Furihata-kun, I—”

“Furi-kun! There you are! Hi!”

Akashi’s hand twitches as he resists the urge to murder this new interloper.

“Ane-san? _Coach?_ What are you two doing here?” Furihata gapes.

“Girls’ Night Out,” Nanase Aya says at the same time Aida Riko says, “Basketball scouting.” They look at each other and Aya chirps helpfully. “Basketball scouting, shopping, you know, typical girls’ night out.”

“Oh my God, are you guys following me?” Furihata exclaims. “Did my brother send you?”

“Follow is a harsh accusation,” Aya says.

“Yes,” Riko says.

“Riko-chan, you are terrible at this,” Aya tells her friend.

“I believe being forthright is the best option in this case,” Riko says, shrugging. “But now that we’re all together boys, let’s go get dinner. Maji Burger is around the corner.”

“I would love it if you two would join us,” Akashi says, plastering on the fakest of smiles. “But unfortunately, I have a reservation at Eiko’s, and I only made it for two—”

“ _Eiko’s?”_ Aya yelps.

“You can cancel it, can’t you?” Riko says, a dangerous twinkle in her eyes. “Isn’t a friendly gathering more fun?”

There’s a challenge in her voice, and Akashi is reminded once again that this girl took a brand new team and whipped them into champions when she was just seventeen. He can only imagine what she will do when she’s older. Probably topple nations.

“Of course,” Akashi says. “But why don’t you join us instead? I would hate to let our reservation go to waste.”

“At _Eiko’s?_ ” Aya exclaims.

“I thought your reservation was for two?” Riko asks innocently.

“Not a problem. Please excuse me while I make a phone call.” One thing Akashi learned from his foster father is that with enough money, you can do anything.

And if he’s about to engage in psychological warfare, he wants it on his own turf.

*

“I can’t believe you’re here,” Furihata hisses when Akashi excuses himself to call the restaurant. “How’d you even know where to find me?”

“Your brother texted me,” Aya says.

“How do you even know Kyo-nii?” he demands.

“We bonded when you were abducted,” Riko says, sharp like a dagger thrust.

Furihata flinches. “Guys, I appreciate the concern, but—”

“But nothing, Furi-kun,” Riko says. “The last time you were alone with this guy you were kidnapped. We’re just here to make sure that won’t happen again.”

“This is my first date,” Furihata wails. “My first date _ever._ ” Probably. This is probably a date. He’s not 100% sure, but the two and a half hour long handholding session does suggest this has some romantic inclinations. “I can’t believe you are crashing my first date _ever._ Are you monsters? Are you heartless monsters? Is that it?”

“Yes,” Aya says with zero sympathy, at the same time Riko says, “Have you just figured that out now?”

Furihata hates his life. He’s fairly certain he’s going to die a virgin.

“I hate you,” he says spitefully.

“You’ll get over it,” Aya says. “I can’t believe we get to eat at Eiko’s!”

I know,” Riko squeals. “I hear it’s impossible to get a reservation!”

Furihata inches away, hoping maybe he can just grab Akashi’s hand and make a run for it.

“By the way, Seirin has you surrounded,” Riko says casually.

“What?” Furihata exclaims.

Riko waves her cellphone at him. “You don’t think we’d come without backup, did you? With one text I can summon the boys from their battle stations. Koganei has instructions to tackle you to the ground if need be.”

“I hate you so much right now,” Furihata says.

Akashi comes back smiling. Furihata has seen him where that expression when armed guards took him to be tortured. “Shall we go?”

*

Akashi is very pleased with his maneuverings because as soon as they enter the restaurant it is very clear that he has the upperhand. The two girls immediately realize they are underdressed for the fanciness of this restaurant and when Akashi graciously assures them he will be paying for everyone’s dinner, he knows he’s placed them in his control.

For a split second it works but Riko recovers first, smiling dangerously as she says, “Well of course you are, Akashi-kun, this was your idea. Besides, kouhai should treat their senpai, don’t you think?”

She’s very good, Akashi grudgingly accepts.

What’s worse, he realizes he’s miscalculated. Furihata _also_ looks very out of place and uncomfortable, which hadn’t been his intent at all. He covertly arranges for them to end in a private dining room.

The girls actually put Furihata a little at ease. They coo over the menu and cajole him into ordering a full meal and dessert, and Akashi feels mildly content to listen to Furihata converse with two people he clearly respects very much.

When Furihata excuses himself to use the restroom the environment shifts abruptly as the two girls whip their heads towards Akashi. If either of them had been holding guns, their weapons would be cocked and loaded, pointed at Akashi’s direction.

“Let’s cut to the chase, shall we?” Aya says, “What are your intentions towards Furihata-kun?”

“Entirely honorable, I assure you,” Akashi says. “Let me be very clear, I fully intend to be part of Furihata-kun’s life. The only thing that will prevent me from this plan is if _he_ wishes me gone; not anyone else. So if we are being frank, let me ask you this: what would you put your mind at ease in regards to my courtship of Furihata-kun?”

Riko eyes Akashi in a calculated fashion. He gets the feeling she’s measuring him; breaking him down in terms of numbers and stats. He never liked that look when he saw it in the eyes of the Teiko scientists, and he doesn’t like it now. “Let _me_ be clear, Akashi-kun, I have nothing against you personally. I know it wasn’t your fault that Furi-kun was abducted and hurt two months ago, and I don’t have any problems with the fact that you’re a mutant. But even if you were an ordinary human with a normal past, I still wouldn’t ‘like’ you for Furihata. I don’t think you’re good for him.”

Akashi raises a brow. “And what makes you sure about that?”

“You’re too controlling, and Furihata is too accommodating. I think you’d railroad him on every matter. I think you’ll destroy him.”

Only _years_ of training keep Akashi from reacting in a visible way. Akashi grew up under intense scrutiny, rigorous demands, and extreme expectations, where anything less than perfection would result in torture, or even death. He does not let his anger show now, no matter how overpowering his rage burning under his skin.

 _You don’t know him,_ he wants to say. _You don’t know him at all._ Furihata spent a week in Teiko and did not break. The people in his life have absolutely no way of understanding just how impressive that is. He hates that they underestimate Furihata more than he loathes how they view _him._

“I could Order you to obey me,” Akashi says casually, “I want you to understand just how easy it would be for me to change your mind. But I will not.”  
“You don’t get points for being a decent person,” Aya says bluntly. “You _should_ be good. That should be your first instinct.”

Akashi flinches, despite himself. _But it’s not. It won’t ever be, but I’m trying and that should count for something._

Furihata returns and immediately senses something’s wrong. The air is heavy and rippling with tension. “Umm… are you guys OK?”

Akashi looks at the unhappy boy. Furihata is clearly uncomfortable with the atmosphere, torn by his own desire to make everyone happy.

 _I_ am _trying,_ Akashi thinks, _And that_ does _count for something._

“Have you ever been to MM Land?” Akashi asks, smile returning.

“What?” Furihata says.

Akashi turns his attention back to his opponents. “I understand your concern. You have not seen me interact in a casual setting very often, so naturally you have reservations. How about we all go out together sometime to MM Land?”

The humans are all clearly taken aback. “The four of us?” Riko says.

“A friendly gathering,” Akashi says, wielding his smile like a weapon. “Of Furihata’s friends and mine. Bring the Seirin team along if you like. I am sure they would enjoy that more than hiding in the bushes or a nearby café.”

Riko grimaces. “You spotted them, did you?”

Akashi sends a look that conveys, _I am an elite trained and designed superior being. Yes, I noticed a group of high school boys hiding in the bushes._

“Does that sound like something you would enjoy, Furi?” Akashi asks.

“Oh—y-yes! I would! But—” he looks back at his Seirin friends.

“Alright,” Riko says meditatively. “Yes. That sounds fun. Say, a week from today?”

“Excellent,” Akashi says. “I’ll buy tickets.”

*

The girls stick with them all the way to Furihata’s imposed curfew, so Akashi doesn’t have the opportunity to talk to Furihata again until he’s dropping him off at his house.

“I’m sorry, Akashi,” Furihata mumbles, averting his gaze and sounding miserable. “This isn’t how I wanted this day to go.”

“It is not quite what I had planned either,” Akashi admits.

“I’m sorry everyone’s been so awful,” Furihata says, looking up, “You don’t deserve to be treated this way.”

Something inside Akashi melts and he feels awash in warmth and tenderness; he is unused to feeling this way—it makes him feel vulnerable but also paradoxically like everything’s going to be fine. “Yes, Furihata-kun, I do. Do not be upset with your friends. It reflects well on them that they are so concerned for you. I could not respect them if they were not wary about my presence in your life.”

“But they don’t _know_ you,” Furihata says fiercely. “They don’t know you at all.”

Akashi thinks it’s funny that the boy so perfectly echoes the earlier thoughts he’d had regarding their opinions of Furihata.

He cups Furihata’s face, allowing himself this touch. “Then we must let them get to know who we are. They will see who we are together and they will withdraw their objections.”

“Akashi,” Furihata says.

And they stand like that, on Furihata’s doorstep, and Akashi thinks how easy it would be to close the distance between them. “Furi, I—”

The door swings open and Furihata Kyo is there, grabbing his little brother by the back of his shirt. “Alright, date over. Good night.” He yanks Furihata away and slams the door over his brother’s protests and cursing.

 _Reinforcements,_ Akashi thinks. _I’m going to need reinforcements._

*

“I can’t believe you did that!” Furihata wails. “That was so rude! And I can’t believe you got _my_ friends to crash my date!”

“Be glad I didn’t do it myself, you ungrateful brat! I’m just looking after you!” Kyo yells back.

“What is your problem?” Furihata demands.

“That boy is after your virtue!” Kyo says, puffing up in outrage.

Furihata’s jaw drops as he stares at his brother in flabbergasted fury. “He can HAVE my virtue! I don’t WANT my virtue! I’ve been actively trying to get rid of my virtue for years! Also, you hypocrite! I know for a fact you were not so virtuous when you were my age!”

“Boys, go to bed,” their mother interrupts, her voice conveying undertones of wrath as she leans in the doorway. “You’ll wake the neighbors. Also, in the morning, we’re all going to sit down and have _a talk._ ”

The two brothers gulp and shuffle meekly to their rooms.

*

“Sei-chan, you should have come to us sooner,” Reo gushes. “Of _course_ we’ll help you!”

“You mean, we get to hang out with Seirin all day at MM Land while you’re paying?” Hayama says excitedly. “I get a date with Izuki? Oh man, count me in.”

“If anyone tries to get in your way, I will beat them to the ground!” Nebuya says, flexing. “I will be your muscled love cupid of justice!”

Not for the first time, Akashi wishes he had better options for reinforcements.

“Akashi, I don’t think you’re thinking this through,” Mayuzumi says. The college student is not voicing his usual protests for being involved in Akashi’s love life, for once.

“I have thought this through,” Akashi insists. “I would like a date with Furihata-kun without anyone’s interference. To do that, I need the four of you to intercept the Seirin team when they try to involve themselves. _Gently,_ Nebuya, no muscles required.”

“That’s less fun,” Nebuya protests. “Then it’s just a bunch of dudes wandering around MM Land together. That’s a little gay, dude.”

“If I have my way, it’s going to be _extremely_ gay,” Hayama says.

“You can stick with Izuki-san but you have to stay on task,” Akashi warns.

“Akashi, I love you, but if it comes to prioritizing your libido or mine, I’m choosing mine,” Hayama says.

Fair enough, Akashi thinks grudgingly. “Just keep him occupied, alright?”

“That I can do!” Hayama promises.

“Akashi, is this really necessary?” Mayuzumi interjects. “You’re trying to get a boyfriend, not win a war.”

“Don’t listen to him, Sei-chan,” Reo says. “Love _is_ war! If you don’t go at this with all weapons drawn, you’re going to lose!”

“I don’t think Akashi should be taking love advice from the person who’s last relationship ended with a cafeteria wide food fight and a School Assembly regarding Proper Behavior for Young Teens.”

“Oh yeah? Well _I_ don’t think Sei-chan should be taking love advice from someone who reads pedo novels!”

“For the last time, _No Game No Life_ has a really complex plot, characters and world-building! Stop trying to shame me for reading the series!”

“It has a panty shot of an eleven year old girl on the cover, you should be shamed on that!”

“We are deviating from the main issue,” Akashi interrupts. He knows from past experience that Mayuzumi and Reo’s battle regarding _No Game No Life_ could be endless, and he’d rather nip that in the bud right now. “I must prove to Seirin once and for all that I am a suitable partner for Furihata-kun. I need you all to provide backup. Are you clear on your role?”

“I’m allowed to arm wrestle people though, right?” Nebuya asks. “If I’m doing it in the name of love and justice?”

 _I definitely need better reinforcements,_ Akashi thinks.

*

Kasamatsu hangs up his phone and spends about three minutes staring at it in slackjawed disbelief, still wondering if that conversation actually happened.

“Senpai?” Kise says, coming into Kasamatsu’s room after raiding his kitchen. “Who was that on the phone?”

“Akashi?” Kasamatsu says it like it’s a question, because he’s not ruling out the possibility of clones, body snatches or multiple personalities. It’s all happened before.

“What! Why is _he_ calling you?” There’s a jealous, possessive pout in Kise’s voice. Kasamatsu is still trying to coach Kise out of his jealous tendencies, but it’s gotten a lot more difficult ever since he moved to Tokyo for college.

“I think he wants me to help him get a boyfriend?” Kasamatsu says, dazed.

“ _What?!”_ Kise says again, bristling in outrage. “How dare he! After that jerk accused me of having it easy!”

“What?”

“Nothing,” Kise mutters darkly. He sits down on the bed next to Kasamatsu resting his head on Kasamatsu’s lap. He looks up at Kasamatsu through golden lashes, and it makes Kasamatsu’s heart still flutter. Kise is so gorgeous, and he has this intense way of looking at him like he’s the only thing in the whole world that matters and it still throws him for a loop every time it happens.

“Don’t help him, Senpai,” Kise says. “Let him hang. That jerk deserves to have a hard time.”

Kasamatsu runs his hand through Kise’s hair and Kise closes his eyes and shivers. If he was a cat he would be purring. “You don’t mean that,” Kasamatsu chides.

“Senpai, you can’t mean you’re actually going to _help_ him?” Kise whines.

Helping a sociopathic mutant get a boyfriend is not exactly how Kasamatsu wants to spend his Sunday, and he’s not even sure how this became his life. But Kasamatsu has a soft spot for all the Miracles. Even though he doesn’t know Akashi all that well, he knows better than anyone just how far he has come. Kasamatsu wants to support any of the Miracles in their attempts to form human connections and personally, he’s rather irritated at the idea that the human boy needs to be _protected_ from having a relationship with a Miracle.

“He’s sort of your brother,” Kasamatsu says. “Which makes him sort of my brother-in-law. It’s only right to help family.”

Kise gets up. “Senpai! That’s beautiful! Do you want to get married, Senpai?”

“Stop, don’t go crazy, be quiet,” Kasamatsu says, silencing Kise before he gets carried away.

*

Himuro hangs up his phone and feels very pleased. “Atsushi, we’re going to MM Land on Sunday.”

“Eh? Why?”

“Apparently, we need to help Akashi get a boyfriend, but really, he’s paying for everything and that’s hard to pass up.”  
“How bothersome, I don’t want to,” Murasakibara sulks.

“But _Atsushi,_ didn’t you hear me? It’s Akashi. Akashi wants a _boyfriend_ , this is the best thing I’ve ever heard.”

“He told us,” Murasakibara says. “It’s super annoying.”

“You knew and you didn’t tell me?” Himuro says. Then again, he’s not sure why he expected Murasakibara to gossip. “Don’t you want to meet the human _Akashi Seijuurou_ fell in love with?”

“Not really,” Murasakibara says.

“Well I do. And apparently Taiga disapproves, which I find even more amazing. We have to be there just to watch history in the making. There’s a 90% chance this all ends with someone’s eye gouged out, and I want to be there when it happens.”

“Suit yourself. I’m not going.”

“That’s too bad,” Himuro says. “MM Land has it’s own exclusive candy shop, and we could probably get Akashi to pay all our expenses.”

Murasakibara mulls this over and agrees this does have a certain amount of appeal.

*

“How did you even get my phone number?” Takao asks incredulously into his phone.

“Takao-kun, you should know better than to underestimate me,” Akashi replies.

“You asked Momoi, didn’t you?”

“…Yes.”

Takao tries to think of a reason why Akashi Seijuurou would be calling him and all he knows is it can’t be good. His first thought would naturally be that something happened to Midorima, except Takao just left Midorima to answer this call; Midorima is in Takao’s bedroom doing homework (Takao figures if he can prolong this phone call long enough, Midorima will have most of the work done by the time Takao comes back, and then all Takao has to do is find some sneaky way to copy all the answers.)

But if Akashi Seijuurou is calling him on the phone, the world is probably ending, and Takao doesn’t need to worry about finishing his homework, in that case.

“What’s up?” he asks, for lack of a better way to ask, “What current hell are we in now?”

Nothing could have prepared him for Akashi’s response.

Takao spends two solid minutes in complete silence.

“Takao-kun? Did you hear me?”

Then Takao bursts out laughing. He laughs so hard at one point he actually drops his phone, which makes him laugh even harder. Tears are streaming down his cheeks by the time he picks up his phone back up and puts it to his ear. He’s still chuckling when the quiet voice seethes, “Are you quite finished?”

That sobers him up very quickly, as he pictures the coroner writing “Cause of death: laughed at Akashi Seijuurou” on his homicide report. “Completely done! And also, I would _love_ to help you out! Nothing would make me happier!”

“I am no longer sure I want your help,” Akashi says, and he sounds so sulky Takao has to bite down another laugh.

“No, no, I’m serious, just tell me what I need to do, Shin-chan and I will be there, at your command.”

Akashi huffs and gives him the details and Takao thinks this is the best day of his life.

When he returns to Midorima he’s still chuckling.

“Who was that?” Midorima asks.

“You will never guess,” Takao says, grinning like a fiend. “ _That_ was Akashi.”

“What?” Midorima whips his head up so fast it looks painful. “Why is _he_ calling you?”

“Shin-chan, it is the best thing ever. Akashi has a human pet now! And he wants our help!”

Midorima relaxes. “The Seirin kid.”

“You _knew?”_ Takao feels utterly betrayed.

“Akashi summoned us once before on this absurd quest of his. It was not important.”

“ _Not important!?_ ” Takao exclaims. “This is Akashi Seijuurou we’re talking about! Akashi ‘all humans are scum’ Seijuurou! _And_ he called all the human boyfriends for help! Shin-chan, I don’t think you realize what this means.”

Midorima looks ruffled. He holds himself stiffly as he attempts to regain his composure. “I am happy for Akashi. But—”

“But?” Takao prompts.

Midorima doesn’t meet his eyes. Instead, he just pushes his glasses up and says, “Kuroko—Kuroko said that it was dangerous for humans to be involved with us. That it would have been better if we had not involved any of you in our affairs—”

“ _Kuroko_ said that?” Takao burst out. “That literally makes no sense whatsoever.” Kuroko had been very smug (in his own quiet way) when the other Miracles found a human boyfriend. Takao can’t picture the other boy changing his mind.

“He had a point,” Midorima says, still not looking at Takao.

There’s really only one thing Takao can do when Midorima is being this stupid. He walks over to the taller boy and sits in his lap.

“Oi—Takao!” Midorima sputters, twisting away.

Takao wraps his arm around the struggling Midorima and holds on tight. He learned this technique from his little sister Ayumi and her pet cat. She called it a “punishment cuddle” and Takao adored this idea and applied it to his boyfriend whenever he could.

“Don’t underestimate humans, idiot,” Takao says fondly. “We’re a tough bunch. We’re going to help Akashi win at love on Sunday, you can’t back out of this.”

Midorima’s body finally relaxes under his hold, more resignedly than anything else. “I am not sure why you care. I did not think you were overly fond of Akashi.”

“Are you kidding? I can’t stand the guy; I can’t wait to crush him at InterHigh this year. But this is different, Shin-chan. Akashi dating a human is a victory for all humankind. Also, I really want to meet the guy who would willingly go to bed with _Akashi Seijuurou_. I mean, can you imagine it?”

Midorima shudders. “I’d rather not.”

*

Kagami is not exactly sure what he’s doing here. He also can’t help but feel like the entirety of the Seirin team is also a little confused by this use of their Sunday. Or at least, the Third Years are. Kagami’s fellow Second Years seem like they’re on a mission.

“Furi, you could be a little more grateful,” Kawahara says.

“You’re crashing my second date with Akashi. My second date _ever_. When you get a girlfriend, I’m going to make it my personal mission to cockblock you at every opportunity.”

“If we ever get a girlfriend, that’s fair,” Fukuda says, with the somewhat resigned air of a high school boy who’s pretty sure he’s not going to get a girlfriend any time soon.

“Is Furihata-kun officially dating Akashi-kun, then?” Kuroko queries.

“I don’t know!” Furihata wails. “And how am I supposed to figure that out if everyone keeps _crashing my dates_?”

On the one hand, Kagami is very sympathetic to his friend, and wants to do everything he can to help him.

But on the other hand, he’s also fairly certain friends don’t let friends date Akashi Seijuurou.

“It is a little weird that the guy to girl ratio on this romantic outing is incredibly skewed?” Izuki muses out loud. “This sort of seems a little more homosocial than our usual team activities. Maybe even a little, hmm… homoerotic?”

“I have no idea what you mean, Izuki-senpai,” Kuroko deadpans, holding Kagami’s hand.

“We’re a team,” Hyuuga says forcibly. “And a team has to make sacrifices for their comrades.” This speech would have been a little more believable if he wasn’t currently blushing and trying very hard not to stare at Riko in her casual clothing.

“Can I just say once again I would really like it if the team did not make this sacrifice?” Furihata interjects.

“No, your opinion is invalid, Furi-kun,” Aya says. Tsuchida is the only Third Year who seems happy about this team outing to MM Land. Probably because it doubles as a date with his girlfriend.

“Uh, guys? Rakuzan is here,” Koganei says.

“You mean Akashi?” Kagami says, craning his head.

“No, I mean Rakuzan and the Generation of Miracles.”

“What?” Kagami exclaims. But then he sees them. The Rakuzan starters and the Generation of Miracles, plus human boyfriends, approaching the entrance to MM Land en masse. Rakuzan is wearing the same matching red shirts proclaiming “Team Akashi” in white letters that they were the day of the Special Diet.

“Akashi!” Furihata says, making his way to the front.

Riko puts a restraining hand on his shoulder, keeping him in place. “Akashi-kun, I can’t help but feel this isn’t quite what we agreed upon.”

“Oh?” Akashi says mildly. “I did say a gathering of Furihata-kun’s friends and mine.”

“How is this even supposed to work? This is practically a class trip,” Hyuuga says, baffled. But he’s absolutely right, there’s over twenty people here, it’s not like they could all wander MM Land together like a flock of sheep.

“Obviously, we’ll all have to pair off into smaller groups,” Akashi says. “I’ll go pay for the tickets, then.” He excuses himself before Riko can protest.

Kagami _really_ has no idea what he’s doing here.

*

Somehow, Kagami ends up in a group consisting of him, Kuroko, Himuro and Murasakibara. He’s not entirely sure how all the groups got divided, there was a whirlwind of voices and shuffling and promises to meet back together in a central location at a certain time. Kagami doesn’t object to his group arrangement, per se, but it’s starting to feel a little like he’s on a double date with his brother, and that’s just _weird._

It’s not that he’s against spending time with Himuro and his boyfriend, but he does think it’s a waste that the four of them are gathered and they’re not playing basketball.

It’s really only natural to challenge Murasakibara to a hotdog eating contest. Park food is expensive, but hey, Akashi is paying.

*

“It is, at times, a bit alarming how similar those two are,” Himuro says, vaguely nauseous at the sight of Kagami and Murasakibara plowing through hotdogs. It reminds him of the movies he’d watch during Shark Week, back in America.

Kuroko makes a vague and noncommittal sound. He looks somewhat queasy as well.

Himuro eyes the smaller boy. “So whose side are _you_ on, anyway? Are you Team Akashi or Team Furihata?”

“I am neutral. Like Switzerland,” Kuroko replies enigmatically.

“Hmm.” Himuro mediates on this.

*

“I feel like, somehow, we’ve lost track of our original intentions,” Hyuuga says, frowning.

“You’re absolutely right,” Hayama says, glued to Izuki’s side. “You should probably go find that coach of yours. I bet she’d keep you on task.”

Izuki frowns, because this is not the first time Hayama has not-so-subtly tried to ditch Hyuuga. Also, Hayama is standing really close to him, so close their bodies keep accidentally brushing against each other, and it’s a bit—off-putting.

“I would love to go find Riko,” Hyuuga grumbles. “I’m starting to feel like I’m on a date with Izuki.”

“Hyuuga, I’d be honored,” Izuki quips. “Oh Captain, my Captain—”

“We should go on a ride!” Hayama interrupts loudly, tugging on Izuki’s arm and pulling him towards the direction of the roller coasters. “I like the ones that go upside down, how about you, Izuki?”

“I actually get nauseous really easy,” Izuki admits. “I’d love a flavored ice right now though—it’d be really _cool_ , don’t you think?”

Hayama bursts out laughing, something that always surprises Izuki every time it happens. “Good one! I’ll go get you one! What flavor?”

“Strawberry,” Izuki says weakly and Hayama bounces away.

Izuki waits for Hyuuga to yell at him for the pun, but Hyuuga only scratches his head and says, “Never mind, I’m starting to feel like you’re on a date with _him._ ”

“Oh thank God, I thought it was only me picking up on that,” Izuki says.

The two friends look at each other for a few seconds. Hyuuga finally breaks the silence with, “If you start dating him you’re on your own. I can only worry about so many teammates dating Rakuzan men, and right now, Furi is the top priority.”

“I don’t think we’re doing a very good job,” Izuki says.

*

“Guys, I don’t know about you, but this is starting to get uncomfortable,” Nebuya says, shifting around. He’s slouching and it takes Mitobe awhile to get why before he finally figures out the poor guy is trying to make himself look smaller.

“Eh? What are you talking about?” Koganei says, looking back at the two taller boys with a perplexed face.

Mitobe grimaces. They’d followed Koganei to the petting zoo section, because he’d wanted to see the animals. But they were getting a lot of _stares._

Mitobe has a lot of young siblings who all look a lot like him. So he’s used to hanging out in children’s play areas and it never occurred to him to feel uncomfortable in the presence of kids before. But he steadily becomes aware of the fact that the three tall high school boys who are not, presently, accompanied by any children are drawing a lot of concerned stares from nearby adults. He can’t help but feel like they’re all five minutes away from landing on some sexual predator watch list so he sends a pleading glance at Koganei.

“What? Why is it weird to be surrounded by kids? You always hang out with your siblings; this isn’t all that differ—oh. I get it. Yeah, OK. Let’s go.” Koganei looks back at the bunnies and sheep one last time and then sighs.

“How did you do that? Did you communicate telepathically? What the hell?” Nebuya says.

“You get the hang of it,” Koganei says, nodding his head. “Anyway, we’re going to have a hard time going somewhere we won’t stand out.”

Nebuya groans. “The things I do for Akashi.”

This statement causes a twinge of guilt. Mitobe came here because Riko was counting on him to look after Furihata, but he hasn’t done anything about that. Now he feels like he’s letting Riko down _and_ in danger or ending up on a watch list.

*

Kasamatsu was pretty pleased with the group he’d ended up in, because (with the exception of Kise) everyone was a Third Year or in college and everyone (again, excepting Kise) was the more serious type of person Kasamatsu felt like he got along best with.

But Kise was decidedly unhappy because he wanted to do date-like things with Kasamatsu and Kasamatsu wasn’t letting him, Tsuchida was very unhappy because he’d gone to MM Land with his girlfriend and then somehow ended up separated from her for the majority of the day and Mayuzumi just looked unhappy to be there in general. Kasamatsu privately suspects this is just his default expression. It makes for a lot of unhappy people in one group.

“Senpai! They have a game section! Do you want me to win you a giant teddy bear, Senpai? I’m really good at these!” Kise says, pointing.

“No, don’t you dare,” Kasamatsu hisses. “I do _not_ want to carry a giant stuffed bear around for the rest of the day.” And his roommates will never let him hear the end of it if he brings one back home. They already give him no end of grief for dating a high school model.

“How good are you?” Tsuchida asks curiously. “I’d like to win one for Aya-chan, but I’m really bad at those types of things.”

“There’s a trick to it, I’ll show you!” Kise says, taking the Seirin Third Year over to the game section.

Kasamatsu sighs. He’s going to end up carrying a giant bear around, he just knows it.

“You’re going to end up with that bear,” Mayuzumi echoes Kasamatsu’s thoughts.

“Shut up, I know,” Kasamatsu snaps.

Mayuzumi smirks. “Oh, the trials of dating a younger man.”

Kasamatsu glares. He doesn’t know the other college student well enough to kick him, but he’s really tempted…

“You’re on Team Akashi too, right?” Mayuzumi asks.

Kasamatsu blinks. “Yeah, I guess. I wouldn’t have put it that way, but sure.”

“So the only one in our group on Team Furihata is the poor guy who just wanted a date with his girlfriend?”

“Seems like,” Kasamatsu shrugs.

Mayuzumi shrugs in return. “That makes my job easier. Akashi gave us one of his credit cards. What do you say, shall we hit up a gift shop and see what the credit limit is?”

Kasamatsu feels that, ethically, he should say no. But he’s had to put up with a lot from the Miracles over the years, and honestly, this sounds like an excellent idea. “Sure, why not?”

*

“Look, it’s not that I have anything against Akashi, exactly. I’m just saying, would you want him dating one of _your_ friends?” Fukuda asks.

“Oh, hell no,” Takao says breezily. “I mean, don’t get me wrong, I’m not the kind of person to get in the way of anyone’s love affair, but if he was dating one of my friends, I’d have to hang out with the guy, you know?”

“Exactly!” Fukuda says, waving his hands around. “Could you imagine playing video games with _Akashi_ _Seijuurou?_ ”

“Or worse, dating sim games?” Kawahara asks, in dawning horror.

Takao bursts out laughing at the image.

“And if we went to the movies!” Fukuda continues. “We’d have to go to movies with Furi and Akashi Seijuurou.”

“And if we threw a party and wanted Furi to come, we’d also have to invite Akashi. Akashi at a game center, Akashi at a Karaoke bar. I just can’t picture it. Uh. No offense, Midorima,” Kawahara says.

“None taken,” Midorima says. “I can’t actually imagine Akashi in one of those places either.”

Takao slaps him on the back. “Not Shin-chan, though! Shin-chan is excellent at Karaoke!”

“Shut up, Takao.”  
“He’s terrible at video games, though, which in my opinion, makes him the perfect person to play with. Akashi ‘I am the absolute’ Seijuurou would probably pwn us all, and that’d just be depressing, wouldn’t it?”

“It would be,” Fukuda agrees. “I mean, I’m happy for Furi, but also concerned? I mean he’d—oh hey, what group is Furi in, anyway?”

“You know what would also be disturbing?” Takao rushes in with, “Hearing about Akashi Seijuurou’s sex life. Furihata-kun could never tell you anything sexy without you picturing Akashi Seijuurou naked.”

Fukuda and Kawahara shudder. So does Midorima.

*

“I’m not saying you’re wrong, exactly, but you’re concerns are invalid. And also, you’re just completely wrong,” Reo says.

“Thanks for clearing that up,” Riko says.

She had meant to stick to Akashi like glue, but Reo had insisted they “needed to talk, just us girls” and had forcibly linked her arms with Riko and Aya and they were in a group together before Riko could really figure out what was happening.

“I’ve been meaning to talk to you, Riko-chan, for a long time now! You’re a sports lady, I’m a sports lady. I understand _completely_ how trying it can be to look after a group of unruly boys! They just bring out the mothering instinct—you want to hug all of them but also hit them for tracking mud all over the floor—it’s complicated! You only want what’s best for them and they just don’t understand that you know what’s best for them! And then they forget you’re a girl and do or say something _really_ pig-like, like stare at some poor unsuspecting large breasted girl and you want to hit them all over again.”

Riko can’t help but nod along—yes, those _are_ her daily trials and tribulations.

“And that’s why I don’t blame you at all for being worried about your boy. But Sei-chan is a gentleman! Really, the best of the best. He is everything you want in a boyfriend! He’s handsome, rich, intelligent, athletic—really, he’s the kind of boy who only appears in shoujo manga. The kind who’s good at everything and you have no idea why he’d fall in love with the ordinary protagonist, but he does and you root for it every time, all the while knowing no such boy exists in real life! Shoujo manga _ruins_ our expectations for what real boys are like. But then there’s Sei-chan, and he’s everything shoujo manga tells you a boy should be. Really, Riko-chan, Aya-chan, your boy is living the shoujo manga dream. I can’t believe you’re trying to get in the way of that.”

“Akashi is _not_ a perfect shoujo manga hero,” Riko interjects.

“Well, no, you’re right. He should be taller, but we can’t have everything. Also, don’t say that to Sei-chan, he’s very self-conscious about his height.”

“That’s not what I meant!!” Riko protests as Aya bursts out laughing.

“And I’ll tell you one thing, between us girls,” Reo drops her voice to conspiratorial levels, “He’s not small everywhere, if you know what I mean.”

“Reo-chan!” Aya exclaims, getting it before Riko does.

“Oh, I know I’m terrible and going to hell,” Reo chirps happily, “But they let me change with the boys because of their misguided perceptions on my gender, so you can’t blame me for peeking. Riko-chan, I’m sure you’ve done the same.”

“ _I have not!”_ Riko says, outraged.

“Satoshi-kun told me you make all the boys take off their shirts and line up,” Aya says reproachfully.

“That’s for training purposes!” Riko sputters.

“Now _that’s_ a superpower I wish I had,” Reo says. She sighs. “No good. I would only use my power for evil.”

“Mmm. Me too,” Aya agrees.

“You are both getting off track! Also, what group did Furi-kun end up in? I want to check in with the others,” Riko asks, pulling out her cell phone.  
  
“Riko-chan, now that we’re friends, I have to ask, do you like Kiyoshi or Junpei-chan?”

“What?!” Riko yelps, almost dropping her phone.

“As a fellow Uncrowned King, I feel I am slightly biased towards Kiyoshi, but as a fellow Shooting Guard, I also feel partial towards Junpei-chan, so I’m conflicted. So which one do _you_ like?”

“What—that’s not—that’s just ridiculous! That question is ridiculous! Aya-chan, help me out!”

“I, ummm, actually _alwayswantedtoknowthattoo,_ sorry Riko-chan!”

“Aya!”

“I’m just saying, if you _had_ to pick. Kiyoshi? Junpei-chan? Both at the same time? Oooh, _both_ , that has possibilities.”

“I hate you both!” Riko says, blushing furiously, refusing to even acknowledge Reo’s last statement, and all the images it conjures. “You’re _both_ going to hell.”  
  
“See you there,” Reo sings. “Oh look, fuzzy ear bands! We _have_ to buy those. I want bunny ears. Riko-chan, you would look adorable with cat ears, don’t you think?”

“Bear ears! We should get her bear ears! I want mouse ears!” Aya says helpfully.

Riko sighs.

She does kind of want the bear ears, though.

*

“Akashi, _I am so impressed right now,_ ” Furihata marvels.

He’s not even sure how it happened. He watched it all unfold and he’s _still_ not sure how it happened. It was like everyone was talking at once and there was a chaos of bodies moving and then somehow, it was just Akashi and Furihata and no one seemed to notice they weren’t in anyone’s group.

“I had a lot of help,” Akashi admits.

“Still, you planned that whole thing, didn’t you?” Furihata still marvels at Akashi’s machinations.

“Naturally.”

“But—why? I mean, don’t get me wrong, I’m happy to spend this time alone with you. But it was your idea to invite all of Seirin, wasn’t it? So they could see us together? Why invite them all here if we were just going to ditch them anyway?”

Akashi raises a brow, like the answer should be obvious. “Furihata-kun, it was very important to me that I speak with you alone. And the only way I could ensure we would not be interrupted was to make sure everyone who could possibly interrupt us was occupied elsewhere.”

“Oh. _Wow,_ ” Furihata lets out the exclamation before he can stop himself. Then he winces at how lame that sounded. He can’t help it—he knows how well Akashi can strategize and manipulate a group, but it always impresses the hell out of him when he sees it in action.

“Why, um, why did you need to speak to me alone?” Furihata’s heart beat flutters erratically in his chest. He’s so nervous about Akashi’s response—he’s not an idiot, he can guess, but they haven’t said it out loud, and as soon as it’s said everything changes, everything, and Furihata is anxious but also excited and awash in longing.

Akashi meets his gaze, steady and unwavering. He takes Furihata’s hands in his and says, “I am sure my actions have long since betrayed my feelings, but I _must_ tell you once again how much I admire and love you. I want to a have a real relationship with you. I was willing to wait for you to clear your head—I would wait as long as it takes. If you need more time, tell me so at once and I will not press you further. My feelings and wishes remain unchanged.”

“Oh, I—wait, are you quoting _Pride and Prejudice?_ ”

“Paraphrasing bits and pieces of it, yes.”

Damn. That was sexy. Furihata swallows hard and he’s blushing so badly he can feel the burn across his face. He is pinned under Akashi’s gaze—nothing on this earth is like having the entirety of Akashi Seijuurou’s attention on him.

Furihata always thought the day the person he loved confessed their feelings for him would be the happiest day of his life. This moment should be an overload of ecstasy. Instead, he just feels curiously sad. “Akashi, I—you know I love you, you have to know that. You know everything.”

Akashi’s hands tighten around his. Akashi’s expression doesn’t waiver, but there’s a distance in his face now, like how he was in Teiko. He doesn’t like what he’s hearing. “Furihata?”

Furihata never wants to be the person who makes Akashi look like that. “ _I_ love you. I’ve never felt this way about anyone—and I don’t think I could ever love someone again the way I love you. But I’m just—me. I’m just an ordinary human. Someday you’re going to realize I’m just a boring human and I—” he breaks off before he can say, _I’d die._

This has been a private fear of his for awhile now. One he hasn’t let himself think too much about when he got swept up in Kyo’s objections to his romance, but certainly there in the background.

Furihata knows Akashi feels indebted to him for what happened in Teiko. But gratitude will only go so far. Now, faced with Akashi’s confession, he still doesn’t believe he can be something Akashi wants.

“And you?” Akashi asks quietly. “I am a monster, Furi. Will the day come when you realize I’m just a killer?”

“That could _never_ happen!” Furihata says fiercely.

“I believe you. Please do me the courtesy of doing the same. You are extraordinary and the only one I will ever want. Please say that I can be in your life.”

Furihata refuses to weep in this moment. Instead, he closes the distance between them and kisses Akashi, feeling bolder than he ever has before. It’s like a homecoming; the familiarity of the kiss, the rightness of it, is everything Furihata has been longing for these past months. The last time he and Akashi kissed they were in Teiko, and maybe it should bring up negative connotations now but Furihata only feels safe, more safe than he thought he could ever feel, and he wants this to go on forever and ever.

They break off when the sound of disapproving parents reminds them they’re still in public.

“I had a whole date planned,” Akashi says. “A very elaborate literary of things to do.”

“Oh.” Furihata says, his mind dizzy. “I don’t suppose there was anywhere private on that list?”

“Why yes,” Akashi purrs, “In fact, there was.”

“Then—maybe we could skip to that part?”

“An excellent suggestion, Furi.”

*

All the groups were supposed to meet back on the grassy area where there would be a fireworks display soon. As the groups slowly come to the designated area, the notable absences make a few things very clear.

“Wait, wait, you mean Furi wasn’t in anyone’s group?” Riko exclaims. “And neither was Akashi? Reo-chan, how could you?”

“Sorry, Riko-chan, my loyalty is to Sei-chan forever. But I’m so glad we’re friends now!”

“Tatsuya, you were on _Akashi_ _’s_ side?” Kagami asks his brother, feeling vaguely hurt but more appalled than anything else.

“Sorry, Taiga. It’s all very Civil War, don’t you think? I think this makes me on Team Iron Man,” Himuro replies.

“You are such a nerd,” Kagami says. “Kuroko, did _you_ know about this?”

“I suspected,” Kuroko replies.

Before Kagami can comment everyone is distracted by the appearance of Akashi and Furihata strolling towards them, holding hands.

The couple stands in front of their friends; Akashi looks very smug, Furihata looks slightly sheepish but defiant, they both look kind of disheveled (and Kagami’s not going to think too hard on _that_ one, nope.)

Riko puts her hands on her hips and says, “This isn’t what we agreed upon.”  
“I wished to speak to Furihata-kun alone,” Akashi says unapologetically.

“I don’t see how manipulating us is going to make us feel better about you dating Furi-kun,” Aya says crossly. “If you tell us you want to prove yourself to us by showing us how you behave casually and then arrange it so you spend the whole day with Furi-kun alone, I’m not sure I can ever trust your character. Your lack of fidelity doesn’t bode well in someone dating my friend.”

“No,” Akashi says stiffly, his eyes flashing at the accusation, “Unjust I may have been, weak and resentful I have been, but never inconstant.”

Kagami has just enough time to think, _What the hell?_ before a visibly taken aback Nanase Aya stammers out, “Did—did you just quote Jane Austen’s _Persuasion?_ ”

“Yes,” Akashi says, smiling fondly at Furihata. “Jane Austen is Furi’s favorite author, so I read all her books.”

Aya blinks in surprise, her jaw dropping. Then, in a strangled voice she says, “Damn. That’s hot.”

“Aya-chan!” Tsuchida exclaims.

“Well, it’d be nice if _you_ read my favorite books, Satoshi-kun.”

Kagami can’t help but note the vaguely wistful look on Kuroko’s face that suggests _he_ wouldn’t mind that either and what the damn hell, Kagami is now losing boyfriend points against _Akashi Seijuurou._

“I _am_ sorry everyone went through so much trouble,” Furihata pleads. “But I really like Akashi. I want to be with him, no matter what. But you’re all important to me and I just—”

Furihata looks caught in a terrible situation; miserable and anxious and a little lost. Kagami starts to feel a little bad.

“Furi-kun, you know we just want what’s best for you—” Riko starts, at the same time Akashi says, “I will do everything I can to make this better—”

The Seirin coach and the Rakuzan captain stare at each other for a few seconds before Akashi says, “I _will_ do everything I can to put your mind at ease about my presence in Furi’s life.”

“You should apologize,” Furihata prompts, nudging Akashi. “They _did_ go through a lot of trouble to come here.”

Akashi looks one thousand percent unrepentant about any trouble the Seirin team might have gone through. But his face softens and when he addresses the Seirin team he says, “I do apologize. I know you were just concerned about your friend.”

And Kagami thinks that all things considered Akashi probably spent thousands of dollars today to get one date alone with Furihata. He’s obviously paid a lot of attention to Furihata’s interests if he’s reading romance books for the guy _and_ apparently Furihata is well on his way to having Akashi completely whipped.

Riko seems to come to similar conclusions, so she nods her head and says, “Fine. You can date Furi-kun. But if you hurt him in any way, you will regret it, got that?”

“I understand,” Akashi says solemnly, “I would not have it any other way.”

The fireworks display begins, effectively killing any further discussion.

The whole day has been pretty absurd, as far as Kagami is concerned. But as Kuroko’s hand finds its way into his he can’t help but feel he has no regrets about coming. And he proved he could eat more hotdogs than Murasakibara, so he’s willing to call this day a win.

*

“Kuroko?”

Kuroko stops walking. He shares a glance with Kagami and indicates that Kagami should go ahead without him. Kagami makes a clicking sound with his tongue but he moves on ahead anyway, giving them their privacy. “Yes, Mayuzumi-san?”

The former Rakuzan student looks at Kuroko curiously. “Akashi told us what you said. He made it sound like you disapproved of his relationship with your friend.”

“I do not,” Kuroko clarifies.

Mayuzumi nods. “Yeah, I didn’t figure you would. But why say all that, then? If you’re happy the Miracles are dating humans, why make them feel guilty for the potential dangers their boyfriends might be in?”

Kuroko’s lips twitch and he replies, “I have advocated for human connections for a very long time now and the other Miracles always tormented me for my beliefs. Akashi-kun in particular was once quite brutal towards a human friend of mine. I suppose I wanted to see him struggle a little bit.”

“Wow. Petty,” Kuroko doesn’t say anything so Mayuzumi continues, “Don’t get me wrong, I wholeheartedly approve. I’m sure I would have done the same thing. But what if it backfired? It’s a bit mean to risk your friends’ chance at happiness.”

“They could not achieve happiness if they were not willing to work for it. Besides, I had faith in Akashi-kun,” Kuroko replies. And as he looks towards Kagami’s waiting back he adds, “I believed in Furihata-kun as well.”

*

They take a private car back to Furihata’s house. Furihata falls asleep on Akashi’s shoulder as they hold hands and Akashi can’t help but think about how it feels like his entire life was leading up to this moment. This is why he lived. This is why he survived. For many things, Akashi feels like he owes Kuroko both an apology and a thank you. It shames him a bit to realize he’s never really said either to Kuroko.

When the car pulls up to Furihata’s house, Akashi kisses him awake. “Furi, we are here now.”

“Oh,” Furihata says, rubbing his eyes. “Oh! I can’t believe I fell asleep!” He sounds disappointed in himself. “I didn’t want this to end,” he says shyly.

“It hasn’t. It’s only begun,” Akashi says. “We’ll have many more days like this one.”

“Yeah,” Furihata says, smiling. When he looks towards his house his face falls and he says, “My brother still disapproves of you.”

“I know. I’ll win him over next,” Akashi says confidently. “I told you, didn’t I? I am going to do everything I can to make sure you’re happy, Furi.”

Furihata blushes and he says, “Me, too. I mean, I’m going to make sure _you’re_ happy, Akashi. It can’t just be me.”

“I am happy,” Akashi says softly. And it’s probably the first time in his life that’s ever been true.

 

 

**~Epilogue~**

 

_The Miracles_

“So you have a boyfriend now, Akashicchi,” Kise jeers, “That makes you one of us now! Feel free to come to me if you ever have any questions, because I am much, much more experienced than you when it comes to love!”

“I will never need your help,” Akashi shoots down immediately.

They are all gathered today—all eight of them, even Hinata—improbably because their significant others were off having a meeting together. Without them. And logically there’s no reason why the Miracles need to gather with each other just because their boyfriends are all off having fun bonding (without them) but no one really seemed to know what to do with themselves so they’d flocked together naturally.

“I am confident I am already the superior boyfriend in every way,” Akashi continues, “I have endeared myself to Furihata-kun’s parents, I am slowly winning over his brother, I am always attentive to his needs; I am sure I am a more considerate boyfriend than _you_ could ever be, Kise.”

“Being a good boyfriend is not a competition,” Midorima says crossly.

“Yes it is. And I’m winning,” Akashi says, smug.

“Careful Akashicchi, those are fighting words,” Kise challenges.

“Also, I wish it known that my human is the best one,” Akashi continues.

And _no one_ is willing to let _that_ one slide.

“What? Are you crazy? Senpai is clearly the best! Senpai came and visited us back when no one else would.”

“I wish to know your scale of measurement,” Midorima says hotly, “Since Takao is clearly the superior athlete as well as braver and kinder.”

“Kagami-kun beat all of you in basketball,” Kuroko says.

“Once!” Aomine says hotly.

“Murochin’s the prettiest,” Murasakibara says, “That makes Murochin the best.”

“Furihata is immune to our abilities _and_ he stood up to Teiko, which makes him by far the most interesting of all the humans,” Akashi explains.

“Kageyama’s a genius setter,” Hinata says petulantly.

“No one here cares about volleyball, Shouyou,” Aomine says.

“Well if you did you’d know that Kageyama is really impressive!”

“Ryou-kun is the best cook out of all of them,” Momoi blurts out.

“He cannot be better than Kagami-kun,” Kuroko says at the same time Murasakibara says, “No one’s better than Murochin!”

And then the implications of what Momoi just said sinks in and everyone stops to stare at the girl.

“Oi, Satsuki, what the hell?” Aomine says, justifiably alarmed.

“It’s not fair I can’t participate just because I’m not dating a human!” Momoi says, stamping her foot. “We weren’t even invited to help on Akashi-kun’s date! I have human friends too, you know!”

“But you’re not _dating_ one,” Aomine feels the need to clarify.

“Well, maybe we both could be if you were a little more open-minded.”

“ _What._ ”

The debate on “who has the best human” derails from there, which is just as well. It’s the kind of topic that could easily lead to superpowered battles to the death.

*

_Miracle Boyfriends_

“I now officially induct Furihata Kouki into the Miracle Boyfriend Club!” Takao says, throwing confetti into the air. “Also, this marks the inaugural first meeting of the Miracle Boyfriends Club!”

“Takao, what the hell?” Kagami says.

“I made T-shirts!” Takao says triumphantly.

“We can see that,” Kasamatsu says.

Takao is wearing a green T-shirt that declares in white letters: I BELIEVE IN MIRACLES. With smaller letters on the bottom that says #MiracleBoyfriendsClub.

“I made T-shirts for everyone!” Takao clarifies. He starts flinging colored T-shirts at everyone.

“I am not wearing this!” Kagami says as he catches the light blue shirt.

Himuro strips off his shirt and puts on his purple shirt with a pleased expression. “Thank you, Kazunari, that was thoughtful of you.”

Furihata silently puts on his red shirt. He keeps looking down at it and smiling, like he’s incredibly happy just to see is against his skin.

“Oh God, can I go home now?” Kasamatsu says.

“No, you can’t, you’re our Vice President!” Takao says.

“What? How? _Why?_ ” Kasamatsu sputters.

“Well, you’re the oldest. And you knew your Miracle the longest, so _technically_ , you should be President, but I made the shirts, so I’m electing myself President. Which makes you VP,” Takao explains.

Kasamatsu looks like he wants to argue this but then he just slumps. “Fine.” He puts on the yellow shirt.

Everyone looks at Kagami and Kageyama.

“No way, this is too embarrassing!” Kagami says.

“No way in hell,” Kageyama says.

“Tobio, you wear orange all the time, I’ve seen your volleyball uniforms,” Takao wheedles.

“No, no way, Hinata will never stop laughing.”

“Oh come on, for me? For one group photo? Hinata-kun will never find out, I promise!” Takao pleads. The two had become friends after the Special Diet—Kagami suspects Takao has a weakness for tall, grumpy people.

Kageyama huffs and puts the orange shirt over the one he’s currently wearing, scowling the entire time.

Everyone looks expectantly at Kagami.

“If you don’t, I’m telling Kuroko you don’t love him enough to wear a T-shirt in his honor,” Himuro threatens.

“I hate you all,” Kagami says, stripping off his shirt and thrusting the light blue one on over his head.

Takao bursts out laughing. “Oh man, that color clashes terribly with your hair! That’s not a good color for you _at all!_ ”

“This was your idea!” Kagami says hotly. “Also, shouldn’t mine be black?”

“I debated that, but ultimately thought it’d be better if you matched your boyfriend. Group photo time!” Takao says.

“You’re enjoying this way too much,” Kasamatsu says.

“Can I have a position?” Furihata asks hopefully. “I kinda want to be Secretary.”

“I like your enthusiasm, newbie!” Takao says. “Done!”

“I think I should be President. I’ve been dating Atsushi longer than anyone else has been dating a Miracle,” Himuro says.

“When you make shirts we can have a re-election,” Takao says.

“What exactly is involved in this club?” Kageyama asks, sounding alarmed.

“Not entirely sure yet, but it’s going to be amazing,” Takao says.

“It already is,” Furihata says quietly to himself; only Kagami hears him. He knows Furihata’s not talking about the club.

He agrees, though. Even in the sky blue shirt that clashes with his hair, Kagami thinks it’s been pretty awesome so far.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Nostacholy's [amazing doujinshi](http://nostacholy.tumblr.com/post/141095384055/designation-miracle) inspired by this universe now has a [second page!](http://nostacholy.tumblr.com/post/142302389105/designation-miracle-p2)
> 
> Thank you everyone for reading this series! Thanks for commenting and leaving kudos or just quietly reading along, everyone is so amazing and I love you all!! =D
> 
> EDIT: The Photo exists now!!!! It exists!!! Please all look at   
> [this wonderful picture](http://furihatacookie.tumblr.com/post/156448448404/so-ive-been-wanting-to-draw-the)  
>  by @furihatacookie


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